I'm going to Germany and my ex says he wants to see me before I go?

I'm seriously considering going to Germany for a 6 month apprenticeship. My ex IM'd me a few weeks ago around the time i had my birthday. I told him about Germany and he's saying that he wants to see me before I go.

I'm calling his bluff. But I don't know if I should allow it to happen. He said he'll fly out here to see me since he lives in a different state. But I don't know if this would be a good idea. He said the break up was really hard on him but that he would not be sad if he saw me. I told him that I'm not going to hook up with him. He said he realizes that and he won't expect me to. Said he just wants to be friends.

Should I allow this to happen? I'm leaning on the side of no.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Tell him no, you've clearly moved on with your life, he doesn't seem to have, so don't give him false hope, say no, go to germany and eventually he'll move on. Good luck in germany.


Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • It depends on how long you've been a couple. Don't underestimate the bond you have, even after break-up, with someone who's been your partner for years.
    The fact that he still cares about you and would like to be friends is not a problem in itself.
    It will also depend on the conditions that brought your relationship to an end. Was it "traumatic" to you? Has he done wrong or have you just been growing apart?

    I would allow him to see you but be clear about what he promised you and he needs to respect that. Not doing it would probably make him very emotional and building up emotions is never good.
    Better to have an open discussion about things.

  • Don't see him... Bad idea. Good idea to come to Germany though :) I hope, you'll like it here


What Girls Said 1

  • Who broke up with who and what were the circumstances?

    • I broke up with him because he let himself go and I did not even have feelings for him anymore. Also because I moved

    • Show All
    • Oh sorry I didn't read that right. Still, it's up to you but if there are no feelings there at all, it doesn't make sense to see him in person. A phone call to say goodbye would suffice, he doesn't need to see you. My ex wants to get together with me to hear all about my vaca - I told him I can tell him via email or the phone. He is using you going away to Germany as an excuse to see you, just like my ex is doing.

    • I agree. I just don't think it would be a good idea... it would lead to him asking for more

Recommended myTakes