just texted her twice since, but didn't beg nor asked for second chance, just went through the shock myself the first few days, and trying to find myself since.
But she initiated contact twice as well , and I do reply, and its really hard to, but I want everything to be straight forward, but I know she will never give me the answers. She doesn't know what she wants, she kept giving me answers like, "I don't know whats right, I have doubts, Iam scared from this, I might regret, so I need time to decide later if I want this." And that made me feel am being played with.., feeling like a man with no dignity, keeping me as a spare tire until she gets what she wants, then throw me away.
I was really good to her, stood up for her, very loyal and extremely honest, and I gave her all the trust left of me that I sacrificed the things I valued, and I was planning for an engagement soon, unfortunately maybe these were somehow the reasons pushed her away, by giving her too much affection, importance and assurance.
Some says that doing no contact is not a mature thing to do nor a mentally strong thing and somehow I agree, but its not fair that she still texts, while she's the one asked for this, I think it is quiet selfish by acting as if the break up wasn't a big deal, and asking things for her own benefit, but I do end the convo politely after I answer her, and thats where I feel Iam being used to fulfill her emotional gap or attention or tell her things she wants to know after she asks how I'am, showing that she cares, while its excluding me.
Friends and family keeps telling me move on, but its not easy as they think, cause I still love her, so I stopped seeking advice from friends or family is that they may not be totally impartial as they also don't like seeing me hurt.
In my opinion if she did truly love me, she wouldn't asked to break up and should've just asked for space, even though we are doing LDR for a year, but its no excuse, cause iam into this too.
Most Helpful Girl
With all my years of wise experience with relationships And----LDR-------the old saying still holds true: Just because you break up, doesn't mean it's "Goodbye, my love." And there is Still another old saying too: "Can't live with em, can't live with out em," and I see your 'EX' is No exception to my golden rule of remembering...
Although you both have split, as strange and as 'Not fair' as it seems, many couples find that although they are no longer hooked at the hip, they have this 'Missing' link that is Still Attached to them, the old memories, just everything that brought them up to the point of instead 'No return'----A Return. But many times it's for friends with or without benefits, and of course, always a chance to rekindle a candle once again.
It was most likley the 'LDR' that got her 'playing' games, It truly Does, for I know from my own personal experience, takes two people to keep it together, and of course patience and understanding and loyalty and-------compromise. I won't lie, it's hard, but can be done. Apparently, in the end, it was one sided and it was You who was doing all 'too much attention, importance and assurance.'
If you find you are not emotionally able to handle this 'friends' factor, then it might just be 'Fair' of you to tell her straight out that this kind of Communication and 'Showing that she cares, excluding me' isn't for you, and that it would be best to move on like two ships in the nite. By doing this, you are showing Both 'Maturity' And honesty. I myself would refer to you as'Noble' and 'mentally strong.'
You say you still love her, and by keeping the contact going, is only going to hurt you more, possibly give you mixed signals that could Occur, and bring you full circle to where you were before the break up.
This friends factor is not for everyone. Maybe it's not for you. Do some serious soul searching. It's your call, your choice. You're a free agent now, doing this for-----Your own benefit.
Good luck. xx1
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