Does my ex girlfriend truly care about me, or is she using me? Should I give up?

So my on and off ex girlfriend of 3 years texted me recently saying that she wants to see me after we broke up. We broke up about 2 months ago because she stopped texting me for about a week and she cheated on me. We have both kept in contact now and then, but this only led to arguments, so I stopped replying for a few weeks.

My ex has her fair share of issues, like dealing with addictions, family issues, etc. I've always stood by her side and tried to support her however I could. She has been supportive of me over the years, helping me get through some of my own issues, and she was really sweet and affectionate until recently in our relationship, she suddenly showed no interest in me anymore.

We've broken twice, the first time we broke up, it was because she said I wasn't affectionate or caring, and we argued constantly. As soon as we broke up, she started dating someone else immediately. I was devastated, but I spent a year trying to win her back, and it became obvious that she strung along for a whole year, and when their relationship ended, we got back together.

The second time we broke up was 2 months ago, she was diagnosed with boderline personality disorder (BPD), and I know that a lot of her actions stem from it. She has a lot of self-destructive tendencies, and lately she's making some bad decisions. I've tried putting up with this, and tried to get her help and support her in any way that I can, but she didn't listen until recently, and she promised that she would get help.

Now I'm hesitant to whether I want to get pulled back into this relationship. I'm afraid she will try to string me along again, and I can't shake the feeling that she's just using me. I care so much about her, but I'm afraid that she will just do this again, because this sort of thing has happened more than once. I feel like an idiot for still having feelings for her, but I need to know if there's any chance that she truly cares about me?

  • Move on
    Vote A
  • Try to support her
    Vote B
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Most Helpful Girl

  • Move on. She does seem like a destructive person. Don't get dragged into it. She is not good now and it isn't you that can save her from herself. She has to do the work. Maybe one day she will be a great girl to date. But not right now. She should probably take a break on the dating scene and focus more time and energy on herself. As for you, i know you love her, bit you seem like a too nice of a guy to be dealing with that kind of stuff. You deserve someone that will be good for you.

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    • Thank you so much, that does make sense. The right thing to do is pursue myself, instead of trying to save someone who can only save herself.

    • Glad I could help. And thank you by the way :)

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