Is anyone willing to listen &/or give advice? (Or yell at me for being a baby?)

My boyfriend (rather ball-lessly) broke up with me by not talking to me for a month & then FBmessaging me. He basically broke up with me because I wouldn't have sex with him. I told him the wk before he asked me to be my girlfriend that I was a virgin & I wanted to take things slow... especially since he was my first guy. Ever. I became close with his older brother... seeing him as an older bro that I don't have.

After a particularly "rough" day with my ex, 2 weeks before he started ignoring me, I went to his brother for advice. He told me that I needed to talk to my bf & tell him how I felt. I had already done that... multiple times. Guess I should have just given up.

Now... its been... about 4 months since we broke up (2 since the official day... FBmessage) & I'm really sad again... not BC I miss my ex. I miss his parents & his brother & his brother's fiancee, whom I had become close with. She wasn't really a fan of my ex to begin with so... buddy buddies! :)

I'm pissed at myself BC I should be OVER that family, but I miss his bro BC he was so nice & consoling & seemed like he wanted to help/make me feel better.

But of course... family come first.

What can I do? I finally got rid of the stuffed pig he won me the second wknd I was at the house... I feel like my heart was ripped outta my chest & I cry a lot... friggin sucks.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm sure it's tough to be a virgin and try to keep boyfriends. It's so cliche that it sounds like it should be from a sitcom, but men and women typically have different values in relationships. Men typically want sex, and women typically want commitment. If you are trying to have a sexless relationship with a man, you need to find a man who values virginity and waiting. If you get into a relationship with one of the rest of us (myself included) we will probably get bored and either want to break up or cheat. Sex is great, and any man who values it probably won't want a relationship with you. I'm not trying to discourage you. From my understanding, virgins are more successful in marriage (along with the obvious no STD risk and no fear of pregnancy). This doesn't justify your boyfriend breaking up with you via Facebook message. He never should have started dating you if he wanted sex, and if I were you, I would try to only date virgins because they will be more understanding of you wanting to wait.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • He and probably you is a kid, still have time to grow up.
    Maybe he wasn't sure he was committed and stopped talking immediately - like you were a short time fling. Otherwise he is a kid who got scared of the responsibility.

    Don't lose your virginity until you are ready and think he's good for you. It is indeed important to say 'choose wisely' every time. On the other hand sex is a miraculous thing, better than you think.

    Any guy who doesn't respect and value opinion on anything, he doesn't deserve you. Man might not agree with our decision but they better do respect it. Every person who cares about will understand your decisions.

    You don't have to get rid of your toy, it is a memory and something to look at in the future, as your first gift from your bf. Cry out until its o. k. but It has been 2 months it is time to move away and find another happiness with another person.
    Trust me these will be happy memories. Try to cherish them and see that there's nothing to be upset about.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Hey hey buddy its okay! Don't you worry. Approach him again. And try to meet his brother too. Talk to him and tell him that is sex the only thing he needs from the relation? Cause for any relation love is needed and with love, an understanding is needed! And its your body, you shouldn't get influenced by anyone. Sorry to say, but people like him have sex with many and thwn wants a virgin to marry! Sorry if that was rude. If you want to hear me more, tell me..

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  • I can see ya developed a lot of affection for his family. If that guy broke up with ya because of such a stupid reason as ya not wanting to have sex yet, it is because of that old and classical reason: he does not deserve ya.
    cmon, ya should find a guy who likes your way to guide life, instead of one who wants to make things his way.
    just remember that if he's not your boyfriend anymore, that does not mean ya need to get rid of his family too. ya can become your ex friend, and start a more friendly feeling on that family
    Hope things will get better for ya dear.

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