What is he thinking and what does he expect from me?

I feel like Im in a dramatic movie. 2 1/2 years ago my ex left me for another girl that he meant during college orientation. I begged for him back as we were together for 3 1/2 years. We were eachothers firsts, we were... best friends. A week later he came crawling back and said it was stupid and that he wanted this to work, (we were going to different colleges that were 45 minutes apart). And so we were together again but it was bumpy. In Nov he conviently broke up with me when I told him my dog died. One night we were together before this and I caught him texting and another girl had said she missed him... and I knew where this was going.
So this time I cut off all contact, I was done and would not be treated like this.
I blocked him on FB... everything. He wrote me a letter stating that he wanted to be friends. I never replied. Since then he tries to contact me at least everymonth whether its via my friends through facebook, emails or texting. I changed my number since. Within three months he gets engaged to someone he just meant and had only known for 5 months. I thought this was stupid as right before we broke up I told him that I did want to marry him... not anymore.
Yet he said his stalking days were over he found out where I worked and showed up with his new fiance. The emails never stopped. One day I got an email from his fiance (which I never meant and dont know, nor have I ever spoke to her) asking if he was always so boring. And then one year ago he wanted to meet up and he still tries to contact me.
I refuse to be hurt again so I dont. But what does he expect from me, does he really love his new fiance. What is going on? I cannot risk asking him and having him think that we are ok.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Even though he doesn't want a Real Relationship with you, no matter Who he has dated, had sex with, May walk down the aisle with----He can't get you out of his mind. If you have ever heard the old expression: Can't live with em, can't live without em, this is one of those cases.
    He may not want to be Committed to you, be hooked at the hip, but yet he wants you in his life as 'Friends,' but perhaps in his eyes, even----Friends with benefits. Who knows for sure...
    And Apparently he sees Qualities he still misses, No matter Who he Kisses...
    You need to be firmer with him, and if all possible, get a restraining order on him. He's got this Obsession with you, and it's only going to get worse, no matter Who he is with.
    He has never found closure, probably never found anyone like you, and by having his cake and eat it too, in HIS Own mixed up mind, he feels he could And Would----Have it all.
    Put an end to his madness. It's no way to live. Always having to look over your shoulder, even having him almost in the same room with his incessant messages.
    Yes, sounds like a motion picture movie that won't have a good ending for you if he Continues down the Pathetic Path... Who knows what he could be capable of next? Look what he has done to your poor heart in the past, like he was this fickle pickle with emotional issues...
    Good luck. xx

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What Guys Said 2

  • As you say, you refuse to get hurt again, so you know that you are doing the right thing by never contacting him again.

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  • The impression I have is that he is very much emotionally attached to you. Thus revitalizing the friendship and the support system he once had with you is of paramount significance to him. He wants to retain the friendship that he had with you prior dating you.

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