My ex and I broke up 1 year and 3 months ago. The reason? Well, I started to feel suffocated in that relationship; although I loved her deeply. She started abusing me & always used to dominate and manipulate me. But I always respected her, loved her and treated like a gentleman. She cared and loved me too, but her negative qualities started to overpower her good things.
So, when she sensed me that the relationship is going to be over soon, she played this drama (I don't think it was real) of gulping down sleeping pills. And everybody in my family and friends suggested me to stay away from her as she could be a real threat to me doing all such stunts. The result, we got separated.
Now after such a long time I still can't seem to forget her. We study in the same college and share the same college bus everyday. So, every now and then we bump into each other. Now, on bad day I got drunk and texted her to talk and she replied positively!
We sat down to talk and I pushed her to talk about what she feels. She broke down and came closer to me and held me tight and asked me not to leave her again (also felt sorry for what she did). We got along again after such a long time. We talked for like 5 days and I backed out again cuz I wasn't having a good feeling. That feeling was really weird. A part of me wants to go with her, while another says no. But I really love her. We didn't have sex in our relationship.
When she started those abuses and all, I really wanted to go away from her. Another thing I want to mention is that people always said that I look much better than her and all. It never bothered me until the time she started abusing and manipulating and dominating me. And I also started to get apprehensive about the fact that once college gets over what's gonna happen to the relationship cuz I never thought long distance is gonna work for us.
I don't what to do now, please suggest me something and help me out!!
Most Helpful Girl
I always believe in giving everyone we love a second chance in a bad break up. But from what I am reading and what you are saying, and Just after '5 days'-------I wasn't having a good feeling.
Go with your gut feeling, sweetie. This zebra hasn't changed her stripes. She's had way over a year to do something about her Abuse and her Attitude, but Evadentally has Failed Miserably... The rest would soon be sure to come... Doesn't take a rocket scientist to see that she's still on another planet, And Not on the same page as you. Your old feelings are beginning to surface with the Signs of 'Suffocation' and the past to follow behind you like a bad drinking binge.
The kindest thing you can tell her is to seek professional help. She is in desperate need of this and without it, whether it would be with You or some Other 'Gentleman,' she won't change without This. She has emotional issues, is emotionally unstable, and even being in a 'LD' would not only put a wedge between your relationship, for I don't think she could handle it, but put you through Hell on the other side, where ever that would be.
Don't get involved with her anymore. Move on. Lick your wounds, forget she existed, and cut off all contact with her. It's time to put the past behind you, to Stop being this Respectful, loving, easy going Enabler of a man. She's bringing you down to her level, stomping all over you like her door mat, and even now, if you don't break free Completely, she will try and Play on your heart strings, with God only knows what 'Drama Queen' Act.
You're asking for Help here. Stay away from her. She won't change without help, most likely won't even Admit she Needs it, and will try and 'Manipulate and Dominate' as she Continues her old ways and Pattern of 'Abusing' You just like the------Good ol' days.
Good luck... The ball is in your court now. xx2
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