Is my ex BF a psycho and potentially dangerous? Help please!?

My ex of 8 months broke up with me in a cold, heartless way 2 months ago. 3 weeks later, he started contacting me, wanting to hang out and see me when I got back from my vacation. He texted me when I was back and we got together with some friends. We had a great time but the next day he texted me and cxld our plans to hang out that weekend saying he'd be in touch- I never heard back. So I sent him an email saying that I did not want contact with him anymore and I was done. He called and left me an angry message demanding to know what that meant - then he emailed and texted me the same message, asking me to call him. I ignored him so he left me another message asking if I was mad at him and saying that he wanted to hang out soon? Wtf? Do you think he's mental and do you think he's potentially dangerous?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Potentially dangerous? I think since you know him best, it's your call as it's difficult to discern just from this description.

    It's understandable given your history with him that you'd not want to put up with his games, but from his side he must not see it that way, so that's why he's wondering what's up. Not necessarily psycho though.

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    • True but it was his anger that frightened me. That was the red flag. How he can not understand why I'm pissed is beyond me. Honestly, this sounds like classic narcissistic behavior, they can reject you but they go crazy when you leave them...

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    • Important factor that I forgot to mention was that he originally broke up with me over jealousy and am pretty sure he cxld our plans because when we were out with friends that night, a lot of guys were hitting on me and he got weird at the end of the night. He's also broke and depressed because he lost his job so he has some serious inadequacy issues going on...

    • Lots of issues, I think you've done right to break communication for now.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • Has he ever threatened you or hurt you before? You know him better than anyone on here. He might just want clarification (which I think based on what you said he should get it, but some people need it spelled out for them) or just want to hear you actually say you're done with him. Unless he's threatened you or done something threatening, he's probably just upset or confused.

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    • Probably but I guess I am just fed up with his behavior and how badly he's treated me. It's hard to believe he doesn't get it. I will respond to him and clarify.

    • Yeah some guys need to have it imprinted on their foreheads to get it. Some women too I guess. I think they probably get it, it's just that they don't want to believe it's over so their mind tricks them into thinking maybe they just misunderstood the situation.

  • He's angry, but I'd say he's neither if he didn't act on his anger yet. Just don't talk to him again and be prepared to get a restraint.

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  • Most likely he just wants some closure and needs to talk to you. There's no harm in meeting at a public place.

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What Girls Said 3

  • I don't think you can tell if he is mental and dangerous based on this. He probably wants to see you because he missed you and is not over the relationship. If you are not comfortable then don't see him because he is clearly upset and either does not understand what you are saying or wants to pretend in his mind that you are not telling him that you don't want contact from him. Maybe he could be dangerous I would not want to find out just continue to ignore him and don't hang out with him anymore even with friends. Make sure they don't try to set anything up either.

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    • Yea I think he's so self centered that he doesn't think that he did anything so bad, but it's hard to believe that he doesn't get it! I understand him being curious but it was his anger that scared me, almost like a "how dare you break up with me" kind of tone. I am going to ignore him but keep my eyes open...

  • Sounds to me like he just doesn't understand why you formed the feelings you did. I would still keep my eyes and ears open if you feel threatened though. It's better to be safe than sorry!

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  • This isn't conclusive enough to tell but I would avoid him.

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