I've been married 6 years, and we've had problems since a few months into our marriage. We've been to marriage counseling (several times), and every counselor tells my hubby he needs to work on the same things. He stinks at communicating, isn't very compassionate/considerate toward me--but is with other people (work associates and mommy), is constantly at least 15-30 minutes later than when he tells me he'll be back, even when I've got appointments to go to.
And, the best part is when I try to bring up any of these things as a concern, he tries to find a way to place the blame on me, even indirectly.
I know I'm far from perfect, but I don't feel that my emotional well-being should be put on the back burner so that he can accomplish whatever he has his sights set on, my feelings be d@$ned. Then, usually later in the day he will come to me and say how he's been thinking about what I said, and that I'm right (duh!), and he does have problems that need to be worked on. Yeah... for at least 6 years now, this is the pattern that keeps cycling, and no real progress ever gets made.
I know if I were anyone else, I'd say get out of it, but we have 2 kids (I know, the mind reels that after all this, I'd think it wise to add 2 MORE children to my stresses), and I really don't want to do the single mom scene. But, I want so so badly to have someone in my life that supports my dreams and doesn't try to compete with me, and try to stay one step above. Even so, being single with 2 kids scares me.
So... after that great big schpeel... what say you all?
Most Helpful Girl
if your relationship is poor your kids will see through that. my parents are like that, one parent refuses to accept any blame or accountability. when a partner will never accept responsibility and agree to change it is a grave thing with lots of resentment. it's not good. but being single isn't easy either... i think you really have a lot to think about.0