Girlfriend of 4 years left me for someone else she just met 6 months before I finish medical school and we planned to get engaged, REBOUND/GIGS?

My long distance girlfriend of four years broke u with me 5 weeks ago 2 days after i flew to Baltimore to be with her in a wedding after i flew back to Atlanta and she went to stay a week with her parents in jersey before going back home in florida, Suddenly communication was very rare for three days than the following day she called me and said we needed to break up for good and she sounded very adamant saying that we were going nowhere. Only to find out two days later that she had met a guy days ago through a friend.
she said they instantly hit it off and spent he already introduced her to his parents and vice versa. I did all the wrong things by chasing her and begging. She responded saying that its to late and that he was already flying to florida to be with her the next day.
Fast forward 3 weeks, she began blowing up my phone saying she was confused and upset that she ruined our relationship but was still with the guy and wanted to see where it goes but that she feels heartbroken and not sure if she made the right decision, saying that if we lived together it would work out and that her family and friends knew we were in love.
three days later she told me not to talk to her because she is in love and he loves her back after a couple week and that he recently quit his job in new York to move to and they are getting an apartment together. I am 6 months from finishing medical school and becoming a doctor which would have allowed us to get engaged and move in together and she knows this. Her mother and friends are really upset with her actions and keep contacting me to fix us and talk sense into her about moving extremely fast. She claimed that she did it because we have no future.


I'm just most confused and blown away by why a guy would move that extremely fast for a girl he just met and why she's open for it even though her mom and best friends are telling her she's making a mistake?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Okay first of all, she does NOT deserve you at all.. Especially if she's playing around with your feelings like that. She seems really confused seeing as one minute she thinks she's 'in love' and the next minute she's doubting it. CLEARLY, she's not in love as she's overthinking the whole situation and is upset because she's not sure whether or not she's made the right descision. You deserve a lot better so you seriously need to stop giving a fuck. Just move on. Simple. As. That. She'll regret it trust me :)

    • thanks a lot for your advice, I was sorta moving on than she contacted me and I got my hopes up again, she said she only contacted mr bc she was nervous about making a big step forward with someone else. I haven't contacted her since.

    • Your welcome! And personally i wouldn't contact her ever again. She's treating you like your second best. Besides, there are so many other woman out there! Just keep swimming ;)

Most Helpful Guy

  • it does not matter what it is considered. She dumped you for a guy she had just met, then she has flipped a couple of times and is messing with your head. It is best to just forget her. Now in your schooling is certainly not the time to have your head elsewhere. Just tell yourself it is over and is not worth thinking about. Move on. And congrats on graduating med school!

    • thanks for the advice bro, we were each others first love so that's why it messes with me.

    • You have a better handle on the facts from where you are, but from what you said I actually suspect that she met him and broke up with you without letting you know it was because she had met him. I went through something similar when I was in the service. Was not engaged but getting closer, when suddenly she broke it off, but she was honest and upfront and told me she had met someone and they had gotten close and would marry. Hurt bad, but she was up front through it so I honestly wished her the best. It is best that you find out about the relationship not being meant to be before you marry. Definitely. Just be thankful for that.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Wow ouch!!! she doesn't deserve you!! Find a girl who'll appreciate you and will appreciate you trying to better yourself!!! Be aware that she'll come back and will try to when things don't work out..

    • Do you think its possible that she actually loves him already?

    • Honestly I highly doubt it!! But regardless she left you for an other guy don't pour salt in open wounds... your going to hurt in the long run.. Congratulations inn becoming a doctor great accomplishment!!

  • Wow... I'm sorry that happened to you... it sounds like a rebound... I highly doubt she is in love already but may be trying to convince herself that she is... it's just an overall crappy situation... It was probably for the best, though... it will give you time to focus on your career and free yourself up to meet new women and find one that deserves you.

    I feel like long distance is just really hard... I gave up pharmacy school because it was out of state and I knew I wouldn't be able to see my BF as much... not sure if that was the best decision... but I'm happy (he's also graduating med school in 6 months... and we are going to get married when he's done... so I understand how much time that takes up...)

    • Its great to hear theirs a loyal girl like you who understands the time constraints med students are going through. I wouldn't be as upset if she broke up with me but its a punch in the a stomach knowing she already moved in with this new guy and they say "I love you" to each other

    • Yeah... well I understand because I was in med school... that's where I met my BF... so I know to give him his space... I dropped out because I wasn't happy... thought pharmacy school would be a better idea but was tired of putting school before people so I decided to do something else where I could be close to my BF... I definitely agree... it must be like a punch... I think the best thing to do is completely cut all contact from her... don't know what is going on in her life... and you'll meet the person you were meant to be with... she could have just been good practice for the real love of your life... trust me on this...

What Guys Said 5

  • 4 years sounds about normal.
    Just as you're about to achieve some of your goals sounds normal too. If there's any way they can make those goals unachievable, they'll do that too.
    I've found that it's also likely to happen during the first month of spring, but that would have conflicted with the timing on you achieving your goals.

    • thanks bro its just makes no sense why she would be with me during med school and end it right before...

    • If you look for reasons and sense in it, you'll just go crazy.
      They don't need reasons.

  • I'm Going To Give You My Unlicensed Professional Opinion, Look, This Is Gonna Be Hard (For You) But iStrongly Advise You To Leave This Girl Alone, iKnow You Love Her But Open Up Your Eyes & Realize She Walked Away From You, She Walked Away From A Four Year Relationship To Go To Another Guy, She Didn't Take Your Feelings Into Consideration, Believe Me You Dont Want A Girl Like That. Find A Girl That Will Stay With You through Thick & Thin, Your About To Become A Doctor, The Money Is About To Be Rolling In Strong, Dont Allow Her To Come Back & Be Able To Spend Your Money. She Moved On, She Is With Another Guy & You Need To Do The Same, Move On, Dont Chase Her, She Wants That, She Wants Her Cake & Eat It Too. Focus Strong On These Last Few Months Of Medical School, Put All Your Energy Into That. Set Your Emotions Aside, Start Thinking With Head & Not Your Heart & Realize She Is Not Right For You, It Will Take Time (Believe Me iKnow, My Girl Dumped Me For A Guy She Works With After Five Years Of Being Together.) Find A Girl Who won't Do You Wrong, But Try & Avoid Telling Them Your Gonna Be A Doctor Soon, When Girls Hear That They Tend To See This "$$$." Stay Strong & Stay Positive...

  • I'm not going to address your questions because they are irrelevant.

    You deserve better. Stop giving a fuck about her. What she does or feels is no longer your concern.

  • Alright consider the fact you're in medical school you should be pretty busy. Maybe she can't stand that and want someone who have more time to fuck?

    I should mean but leave her and move on. Doesn't matter if it's rebound or real. She saw no future because she doesn't want a guy with no time for her. I'm sorry bro but move on, it will be good for you.

  • You're worth a lot more than what she offers, go find someone that is worth your time, she had her chance and she ruined it. Don't try to fix that relationship, even if you were together for 4 years and it may seem hard atm. You'll find someone that truly appreciates you and cares about you. This is just a new chapter in your life that you need to learn from. Congrats on becoming a doctor btw, continue pursuing your dreams and make them a reality.


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