Give husband 2nd chance or stay with boyfriend?

husband in the middle of five year prison sentence. he was in and out of jail for 12 years we were together. I cleaned up from meth and he couldn't. he cheated and lied, even hit me. but we have three kids. and time in prison can. change a person. since he's been in I've been meeting nothing but guys who disappoint me. I finally found one that is wonderful and wwe've talked about settling down together. but my kids are very difficult to handle and he's not much help in that department. he's very quiet and patient about it but they know he's not their dad so it's basically all me taking on the stress. it's been hard and I think he's not happy not says he is. I've been overwhelmed and preoccupied and it's been causing arguments.
I think maybe my husband will change finally and learn his lesson. Then We can be a family. seems guys can't handle my family so I'm giving up.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Firstly, ask yourself, do you think your husband can be a good dad? When he done bad things, is he doing it for family or just for himself knowing the risk of being jailed?
    Your words of 'maybe' reflect that you yourself didn't know if your husband can be a good father. I personally believe in second chance but you have to be sure your husband is ready to take your chance. Ask for third party opinion (your close friends) about your husband. If they say he should have one, and you feel that your husband deserve second chance, then give your husband second chance. It is advisable you ask for third party opinion on your husband because if you depend only to your opinion, you might refer only to good/bad memories with him.
    About your boyfriend, if you decide to stay with boyfriend, ask him to acknowledge his role as father in your family. He might be just stepfather to them but it doesn't mean he can make it unimportant. Kids need father in their life, trust me. If he can't do that, he is no better than other men you met.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I'm Going To Give You My Unlicensed Professional Opinion, Your Husband Is In & Out Of Prison/Jail, He Is A Liar But Worst Of All He Hits You. iSuggest Leaving Him For Good Cause One Day He Might Hit You Too Hard & Kill You. iKnow You Need/Want Help With The Kids & Your Boyfriend Is No Help In That Department, iSuggest Finding Somebody Else That Isn't In Prison, That Is Honest & Doesn't Lay A Finger On You, Plus Can Help With Kids, Stay Positive & Stay Strong...

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  • Choose no one or the new guy you met.

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