Thoughts? Am I too desperate?

I broke up with my ex 8 months ago as we were very short with one another and it was painful- he wanted to talk it out, but i ran... We were together for 4 years.
After we broke up, his parents divorced and a lot of life changing stuff happened.
We always see one another twice a week as we share the same social commitments…

I always loved him and still do, but I kept my distance for about 7 months before I started to crack. Recently I told him i still love him and how it hurts to see him so often but knowing we can't be as close.

Because he has had so much going on he was shocked at how long it has been. He told me he does not want to get hurt again so he has ripped out the feelings he had for me. I understand he has gone through a lot however because he could be around me so easily I assumed his feelings were never that strong to begin with.
He became angry and eventually told me he loved me and still loves me, and there are times when he just wants to reach out and hold my hand BUT because so much has changed with his family and this is not the first time we broke up.. he wants to just be friends and save himself the potential hurt.

But back to my question am I acting too desperate?

I contact him and ask him about his new job and family (we talk for hours)
I text him at least evey 3 days including group messages I send. ( if I don’t text he will text or call me after 5 days or so)
We always sit next to each other when in groups.
I always linger with him
Nether of us have dated or considered dating anyone else.
I have deffinatly come on strong in the past month..

Should I back off?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • This isn't an issue of you coming on to desperate, this is an issue of him completely letting go of your once existent relationship.

    He's telling you that there's no way he can endure a relationship with you again, YET he's doing the exact opposite of what he's saying. He's allowing you back into his life, having daily contact with you, not only returning your messages, but initiating it himself, and not made a strong stand to move on from you. THIS is the real issue. This guy is NOT holding strong to his convictions.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I'm Going To Give You My Unlicensed Professional Opinion, If He isn't Saying Back Off Or His Actions Aren't Showing That He Is Annoyed Then Your Doing Fine. He Is Protecting His Heart & Feelings (Rightfully So) So Dont Try & Force The Relationship Back Together, If You Want To Win His Heart Back It Will Take Super Patience. Be A Friend First, Then SLOWLY Progress To Expressing Feelings, If He Rejects, Back Away, Stay Strong & Stay Positive...

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  • if u love him, u have to try. doesn't have to be every single day, but u can check in on him, let him know u r different now and want to try again. let him know u r there for him if he needs n just take your time

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