I'm running out of ideas, help me out!?

My bf of a year broker up with me about a month and a half ago but it's only been about three weeks since we last spoke (or texted) . He never gave me a very good reason got the break up just: "he doesn't know what he wants and don't know when he will", so i let him know he was wasting my time then. Shortly after he deleted me on all social media.
I really miss him, but i don't know what to say to him especially since it seems like it's a problem within him, like i think he'd scared to move forward and become more serious (like moving in, etc.).
So i haven't even tried to say anything or make any move because I'm just So lost. I don't want to seem like a loser, begging for him back, but i also don't want to allow my pride to hold me back. I have no problem putting myself out there even if i get rejected but i at least want to feel like there is somewhat of a chance.
Right now i still feel like i have a shot but i don't want to say the wrong thing and totally ruin everything.
So if anyone has advice on what to say or do, it is welcomed.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Be calm. Do not get angry at anything. This is an opportunity for you to look at yourself and decide what you want for yourself. Try to be the happy person on the outside.
    Men dont like bad temper or friction and will avoid it.
    Big mistake is to ask opinions of mutual friends or family. Don't do that because they have their own motives for pushing one way or the other. They are most dangerous people.
    Look at your qualities and make yourself happier for yourself. Take a new hobby , activity, fitness and fill your time. Have a makeover if it makes you feel better.
    Don;t contact him, go quiet and dark (no contact) and if he calls make it brief and explain that you are busy.
    Make yourself mysterious and interesting to yourself. If he doesn't want you, someone else will.
    Make him have to win you back.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • I'm Going To Give You My Unlicensed Professional Opinion, You Need To Realize He Knows You Want Him Back, If He Doesn't Want This Relationship To Work Then Dont Try To Force It. Your High On Emotions & Need Time To Self-Heal, Stay Strong & Stay Positive...

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  • He dates you for a whole year and leaves? He sounds like a big idiot to me.

    You said he never gave you a good reason? Well what was his excuse?

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    • First, it was that we don't connect on things, but that was a lie and i hella called him on it.
      Then, he said he just can't be in a relationship right now. Which i don't get because it's been a year already, soooo...
      Eventually he left it at not knowing what he wants.

    • I hope he wasn't one of those guys that dates and got a girlfriend just so he could tell people he wasn't single.

  • ya hurt his feelings by not being patient with him, maybe?

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    • Possibly, he does take forever with everything. But after a month of trying to get him too tell me how he feels or what he wants, it gets pretty frustrating when he won't especially when i don't hesitate to tell him when he asks.

What Girls Said 1

  • Something like that similar happened to me in like March 2014, my ex came over to my table and sat down and he said our relationship was to hard for him even though he didn't do anything, he just broke up with me like right out of the blue but he never gave me a good reason, so I see where you are coming from. In my opinion, don't chase him because it'll make you look bad. If he wants to come back to you he will, don't go around begging for him to come back. Not all guys deserve a stop in your life, so just come by to teach us lessons whatever that lesson may be. My ex left me for like no good reason honestly and after that we never talked again. My advice would be just take baby steps and go slow don't text him or anything like that because its gonna make you look bad. You don't chase boys let them come to you. Just move on with your life and you find someone else that loves you for you. I know you miss him I can understand I missed mine too but not anymore we go to the same HS but I just act like he doesn't exist. I can understand you are probably sore or have a wound on your heart and its going to take time for it to heal. Just take baby steps and distract yourself from the break up don't let it be you up. Well then if he's scared of moving forward then that must mean he isn't ready to put commitment in your relationship. My ex was the same he didn't want to commit, he didn't want to do anything besides sit around and treat me like I didn't exist so your not alone I've been there too. I'm pretty proud of myself now though because I don't deserve anyone that doesn't deserve me and of course he didn't. Focus on other things and don't let your break up wit him distract you. Its his loss if he broke up with you, not yours. So don't put the blame on yourself. Just stay strong and take baby steps don't chase after him and if he begs for you to come back don't do it. Because I did with my ex and I got hurt and he broke up with me. He led me on and spit me out.

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