What is going on with my ex?

I broke up with my boyfriend of two months at the beginning of the year. We've seen each other a few times and I asked him to go to brunch yesterday since I haven't seen him and he was all for it. So I'm at the restaurant and he hasn't shown; I called and he said he overslept so I told him he had 20 minutes and I'm leaving. He shows up 10 minutes later and we eat. He's smiling a lot, flirting, his knees are bumping against mine, we're laughing and he made compliments about my appearance AND paid for the meal. After we go for a walk to a park and we're sitting and enjoying ourselves when he makes a comment about my chest and how he was going to keep things to himself. I noticed a hair on his neck and touched it and I could tell he was getting hard. So he and I were nose to nose, playing with each other's hands, etc. So I mentioned friends with benefits and he said it's tempting and he doesn't think it's a good idea because obligations and what if he's seeing someone or I see someone and he wants to be together one weekend and I'm seeing someone else. He mentioned he also did it before and it didn't work out. Then I kept saying let's go make out and he said earlier he had a thing so he walked me to my car, we held hands and he tried to leave and I wouldn't let go because I wanted him to kiss me. Instead he didn't and said it wasn't fun anymore. He kissed me on the forehead and gave me a hug. I text to tell him sorry for being discreet and he text back around 11pm, "You mean opposite of?" And then text me at 7 am saying he had an interesting night at the bar with his friends. What's going on? Does he miss me?
  • He misses you
    Vote A
  • He's confused
    Vote B
  • You're reading too much into it
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Guy

  • He obviously would date you again, but he doesn't want to be just sex buddies. I think he is telling you he really likes you and it would be hard for him to want to see you but have you be with someone else. Basically he is saying it's all or nothing. Why did you break up with him in the first place? You obviously are attracted to him and still want to have a physical relationship with him. So I am really confused as to why you would break up with him?

    • Correction: he broke up with me.

    • Show All
    • I'm not quite sure, which is why I'm here. He and his ex were broken up for a year (dated all through college) and remained FWB. He mentioned when we were talking (Nov '13 to Jan '14 before we were exclusive) that he slept with her early December. And maybe he doesn't want it with me because he probably still has it with her. To my knowledge, he never mentioned me to her, which I thought was odd. Even after breaking up he said he'd mention me to her to which I said,"What's the point?" ... It may be a loyal thing; doesn't want more than one FWB. I noticed on FB he tagged her for that damn ice bucket challenge.

      Talking since, yes. We've been texting back and forth about what reality is; he and I are into intellectual conversations. He's agreeing with a lot of what I have to say and also challenging some. Other than that, no initiation to get together again.

      I don't know. Maybe it's just my wishful thinking, only seeing what I want to see.

    • To be honest, it actually sounds to me after thinking about it that there might be someone else in the picture. I have had something similar happen to me and it was because of someone else. In my case the girl actually made out with me a few times, then before we could really start dating she told me about the other guy. I still see her a lot, but I know it didn't work out with the other guy, but that was my initial roadblock, so it might be in your case too. Else, a guy is not going to pass up making out with an ex that turns him on. Just don't let him string you along. I have let this girl do it to me because I like her so much. Lately I have taken charge of the situation, so just be careful of that!!

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