Yeah well I don't actually have any.. But I thought this would be an interesting question...
Worst/funniest/saddest break up story?
What Guys Said 8
yeah - in college after several break ups with ditsy women, I had a nice relationship with a girl, but then she got ditsy on me and pulled the old "I need space" thing. Having been through that before, I said "OK." and she left and I put her out of my mind. She called back about 2 weeks later and was wondering where I was, and I told her "in space!"3
My good friend and I look almost identical, if we stood together you would not be able to tell us apart unless you knew us really well.
So he had a girlfriend, she knew of me, but hadn't actually met me. Now, she must have wanted to break up with my friend because one day I was waiting for him and she called me one side, instead of him (yeah, shows how much she knows him) and started giving me the load down as to why she hates me and a list of all these things I do wrong. She seemed pretty hell bent on getting it all out so I stood there, nodded when I had to and the next time I know her actual boyfriend, my mate, comes walking around the corner. I know this because he jaw literally dropped while she was talking to me.
Haha it was quite the story explaining to her that I was me and he was, well, him. Eventually, some hours later, when everything settled, she decided she loved him for all he's imperfections and decided not to tell him that her intention was to break up with him and being a good friend I kept my mouth shut because he really really loved her.
I'll tell him one day, and he'll most likely try to kill me for keeping it from him, funny thing being I been keeping this relationship going for all this time because whenever she has doubts, she comes round to talk to me because no one knows him better than I do haha. What are friends for huh :D1
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Best breakup. Fictional, yes. However, still the best:
This wasn't mine, but still funny.
It was at the beginning of my junior year of college. This one couple in my class had been dating for about two years. She broke up with him on the day that he was going to propose to her.
A short while later, he returns to his dorm. Suddenly, some guys here a bit of a ruckus coming from his room. One guy heads over to investigate. He peeks inside the room and sees the just-dumped fellow angrily throwing things around in his room. He asks him "are you all right?" He stops, turns to him, and says "Time! I just need some time!" He waits a few seconds and then starts trashing his room again.
Allegedly, almost six years later, he still can't understand why she broke up with him.1
I do have one. İt is funny and sad at the same time :) İ was really a very shy boy when i was at üniversity... İ got over it later... There was a very beautiful girl in the morning classes, and i was going to school on the afternoon... I fell in love , when i saw her at first time... She was always un my mind. İ started to go to school earlier than usual, to see her ten more minutes at the break times... İ was not able to express my feelings , because i was shy... İt took about five months... And at last i found a courage to talk to her.. There was a rock concert in my town, and i decided to invite her. İ was planning to tell her my feelings at the most beautiful song. İ asked her, and she smiled and said: let ne think, i will telli you layer... That smile was enough for me, i was happy and i bought the tickets... The world was perfect for me... Next i was excited, and went to school early again to talk to her.. İ asked: So are you coming? She said only one thing : i am sorry, i have a boy friend... She said nothing more ABD left...0
My story is really sad, well to me at least. To summarize it...
Started when I would see the most perfect girl during passing period. Immediately assumed I had no chance with her, but she was too perfect to resist.
Made a move, #SUCCESS. Nigga we made it. Turned out she had seen me in the halls too and felt the same way. We got to know each other and we had everything (literally everything) in common and so everything was perfect.
One day, I get a text: "I think we're better off as friends."
Took me 2 months of depression/barely eating/ songwriting to get over her.0
I have so many but I will do the quick version of one. I spent about a thousand bucks on Christmas gifts for my x and her son. She wasn't home and left them at her parents house. I came by 2 more times and she was home the second time. She told me that her parents got too close to me and we will have to see what happens. I left it alone and about 2 weeks later I was driving with a new girl I was seeing. I was speeding and got pulled over. The cop arrested me for harassing my x gf. I got out ROR and had to postpone my trip with my new gf. I went to court and showed records of where I was and proof that I wasn't stalking her. I found out later that she did the same thing to about 4 guys.0
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What Girls Said 15
He broke up with me a week before Valentine's day, also he was talking about how beautiful one of my friend was before our break up. I learnt from my friend that my ex bf asked her out at the Valentine's day. So i texted him "chicks before dicks she will never accept it and leave my squad alone, go find yourself a new clique" Because like we dated for two months and he saw my friends once and he was thinking that my squad is his friends, but no. Then at the same day he texted me "i miss you lets meet and come back together". I dont know why, i accepted his offer. I think i was too needy at that moment i dont know. I knew that he wanted to make out with me and he offered me to go to a movie. I bought push up bras, i usually dont wear make up but i did go to coiffeur to get a make up on by professional and i wore inappropriate clothes (to see a movie). Then we saw each other but our ticket for the movie was for the very first front line so he rejected to see the movie and we decided to see other movie at the back line. Then minutes later i started to make fun of a game he plays. He got annoyed by this and said "if you are going to do this i will go home because i dont want to see a movie with you." It was expected but i was naive by then so i couldnt see this coming. I said "You can go to your home if you want, my friends are here, watching another movie i can join them." Then he said "OK i am going home see you." I said "See you" but of course i didn't know he was actually going back to his home. I walked a bit and waited for him to come but he didnt. I left the movie center and take the subway to his house to beg him come back to me. He didn't answer my phone, he texted me like get out of my life. Then i went to get mcdonalds in his neighborhood. Then exacly a month later, i found my first love. It was unexpected, it was and is beautiful. When i uploaded a pic with my current bf, my ex texted me saying whatsupp. I blocked him.1
Worst & Saddest: past boyfriend broke up with me on Thanksgiving day right after I had dinner with him and his family. He said that since I wasn't a virgin... I was "used" in his book which made me feel worthless for a couple months.
Funniest: I don't have any funny break ups.1
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Okay here's mine. So I met this great guy (so I thought..) at work and after a couple months we ended up dating. Eventually we moved in together. He had a crazy baby mama and an adorable son! Anyways things seemed great. then he started being controlling and fighting with me and accusing me of cheating. One day he went into the store and I had a phone call so I stepped out of the car and was talking on the phone. He went all psycho and started choking me in the parking lot then dragged me into the car and took me out into the country and said he was going to kill me. So naturally I started beating the crap out of him and begging him to let me go. nyways when we returned home I found out that he was cheating on me with 14 y. o girls. Mind you he was 24 at the time. Oh and he now has 6 kids but only claims one. He even had the nerve to beat the crap out of me when I tried leaving. Needless to say I waited for him to leave our house then called the cops so I could move my things out. I only called the cops so I would be safe if he showed up. That's my worst break up story. I haven't seen him since and I am so grateful0
Well it's a little sad, but it happened 3 years ago so it's mostly funny to me now.
It was mine and my (ex) boyfriends 1 year anniversary and his birthday and things hadn't been going great for a while.
After went to the cinema (where we kept the armrest down) we drove back to his, which was in the middle of nowhere and I gave him his presents. This was a handmade memory book with pictures in, quotes, personal jokes and things that reminded me of us and £20 of vouchers to spend in his favourite shop.
After handing it to him he started crying and told me he was going to 'ruin everything'. He thought it was best to break up and he dumped me right there and then.
Because it was late and we were in the middle of nowhere, I couldn't get picked up and I spent the whole night crying in his bedroom with the door closed on my own.
About half way through the night he brought me his cat to 'cheer me up'. I just remember shouting 'WHY WILL THIS HELP. I'M NEVER GOING TO SEE THE CAT AGAIN'. Always makes me laugh now.
In the morning I got the bus home... I was getting ready and his parents asked me why I was upset. He hadn't even told them. Worst thing was, in the morning we had break up sex. YAY
It turned out he had been cheating on me for months. Nice guy.0
Worst: He did it through the phone and his excuse was, wait for it... "I'm going to a festival this weekend, so I don't think things will work out." He hung up, and I was so confused about it all, I didn't even find the words to argue back.
Saddest: He moved to another country.0
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I personally don't, but a friend of mine does. Long story short, he was on-and-off with his girl for almost 10 years. She only seriously broke up with him when he changed his Facebook status to "single", allegedly while also throwing stuff at him. Ahh, the brave new world that has such people in it...0
Lol.. a bit sad, but I got home... my man was kissing this Swedish chick... I got angry at first! Fought with the girl big time... dumped him and lateron I heard that he was traumatized because he found out that she had a dick as well (seriously true!) lmao... so nomatter if she was a girl or a man.. I beated her (him) up! lol0
Back in the MySpace days, high school for me, I found out my "bf" was cheating on me because I googled his name (I was trying to find a boxing match of his that I wanted to go to) and some poor girl had "~~*I LOVE [his name here]~~* as her display name. I had to go super creeper status, make a fake profile and talk to her as his "long lost best friend" who was trying to get into contact with him. I never outed him because I actually felt too bad for the girl. Like... even though I was totally obsessed with him I could tell she liked him more than I did.
Oh, did I mention this was on Valentine's Day?
My poor 16 year old heart could hardly take it. And I'm glad my first heartbreak was over a total douche I could laugh about later and not something I would actually regret. First cut is the deepest and all that.1
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my boyfriend of 3.5 years punched me in the face with every ounce of strength that he had and busted my jaw. that ended our relationship pretty quick!0
This is about my friends. We were all freshmen at the time so we didn't have a clue what we were doing or what was going on. My friend was 'in love' with this guy but one day during lunch he bf walked up to her and just ended it right in front of everyone. My friend jumped on a chair and yelled out, "Asshole, you think you can break up with me? Why? Cause I didn't suck your dick the other night?" Then she threw like three baked potatoes at him. That was such a crazy day xD what's even more messed up was that we were freshmen and like half the school then knew a tiny bit of their life0
I used to date a guy who was new to my country. He is so perfect, and we spent all weekend together. Then there was a day when he texted me and said "I am afraid that I can't give you how much you gave me". Then we just didn't talk anymore.
I went out with my friends for a drink one weekend, and I saw him and his visitor walking passed us. So I said hi to him and he was like How are you and the conversation didn't last 2 minutes. He didn't even say goodbye when he was leaving. It has been almost a year now, but sometimes I still miss him and sad that I was too pushy that time.1
More of a rejection then a breakup but, same same... Well since apparently I'm a bitch this guy who randomly decided out of nowhere to start texting me through Facebook even though he never talked to me at school or anything started saying all this weird shit about really liking me and hating himself until he met me and how he was totally in love with me (he was dead serious and this was after talking for 30 minutes not even)... So anyways I got a little weirded out but, just went with it but, I guess that was a bad idea cause he Thoth that I liked him and started getting obsessive and jealous and saying he was extremely passionate and goodness knows what else so I blocked him and pretended to change my cell number (the next time he texted me I sent back a text that said the number was changed and blah blah blah and he bought it lol) so then I ignored him for 2 months then randomly decided to talk to him to see if he wanted to explain why the hell he was being so strange and I was gonna give him a second chance... 1 minute into the conversation he went wacko again and asked me out 15 times but, worded it differently each time and then I got fed up and flipped out at him and told him to never talk to me again and to duck off and leave me alone and he was like oh sorry text me whenever ur ready to talk and I just said don't bother holding ur breath and I haven't texted him since :).. Reading this now I feel like such a bitch Oopsie0
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