Should I and How can I get my ex back? Should I tell him I miss him? (broken up for 4 days)?

So my boyfriend and I of two years broke up but when we broke up we didn't really talk about why. I mean, I told him that I felt our relationship died out and we barely talked over the summer, the sex life was non-existant and I thought we should break up. But he didn't say anything. He just stared out, and then walked away. I asked him if we were broken up and he said if that's what you want and I said yes.

It's been 4 days since we've broken up. I've tried reaching out to him and asking him if he wants to talk about our break up, or say something to me. He said he needed time, and i've been respecting that, but I'm confused.

We didn't really talk it out, I thought he would try to talk it out with me at least, or at least say something, or ask why more but he didn't.

He said he still has feelings for me-- but the way we broke up.. it just felt like he agreed, and doesn't want me.

I feel like I may have rushed in my decisicion.. or I could have instead of asking to break up, have a conversation about trying to fix our relationship. I feel like maybe I shut down too quickly. Everywhere I go I feel like something is missing, and I know it's him. Even going to walmart was hard without thinking about him and how he was always there for me, and how we would joke about stupid things we saw on the shelves.

What can I do about this? I miss him a lot, but we did break up for a reason. There is no garuntee that everything will work out if we try again. I'm afraid we'll just be frustrated with each other all over again. And I don't even know if he'll take me back. But I feel empty, and like I lost my best friend.

Is this a situation where I should just give up on our romantic relationship and hope time heals and lets us be friends? Or should I ask if we can work this out and own up to making a mistake?


Most Helpful Guy

  • If he wasn't banging you, why would you even want him back?
    He's useless.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Its only been four days give it time and let your wounds heal, it might take months to heal I know it did for me. My ex pretty much led me on and then left me right out of the blue he left me confused but its been 5 months since we've talked and still no communication. Sometimes its better to leave relationships broken then to keep putting the pieces back together no matter how hard you try it won't stay together. Don't reach out to him either let him do it if he wants you back. Do not chase him either because that will push him away even farther. I went back to my ex I was stupid and got hurt, be careful whatever you chose. I tried everything with my ex trying to fix our problems and stuff but his problem was he didn't want to put the "work" into the relationship and try to work it out. That's how I used to feel my ex broke up with me but I don't feel that way anymore because those feelings aren't there anymore. Give it time and don't rush back to him or run back to him or chase him let him come to you. But be careful because it can be a trap. What was the problem in the relationship? Were you doing all the work, did he not know how a relationship was suppose to go or something? Don't the same mistake I did place because I do regret it. You might be broken for a couple of days but try to walk it out and don't be so hard on yourself or anything. It just takes baby steps it did for me. That's nice that you guys started off as friends my ex and I never started off as friends which I think probably messed us up. But everything happens for a reason, sometimes I wish I knew what that reason was. If you aren't sure of a decision making always listen to your heart or go with your gut it'll tell you right from wrong. Don't blame it all on yourself if the connection isn't there anymore then it isn't there.


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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 2

  • You're having break up remorse. You miss the aspects of the relationship that made you fall in love and not him or how the relationship was actually progressing. It's only been 4 days. If it had been 4 months then maybe you should go back but right now I say no.

  • Not tryna stereotype, but running after him will make you look a bit weak. Just sit back and wait to see if he returns to you. If he does, then you're good to go :)

    • but what if I wait too long and he moves on, or decideds he doesn't want to try and fix anything because it's been too long?

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    • Yeah, well we go to the same college but we are apart for breaks. He is literally the sweetest, kindest guy i've ever dated, and cute to boot. It just when we were together before this summer break we were going through a major dry spell. Mostly my fault because I think we both got so frustrated with it since he's not very experienced and I wasn't doing a great job explaining to him what to do- and because of this it was fairly painful and made me shut down. So that definitely put a huge cramp in things, and killed out sex life (haven't had sex in over a year). So i just felt like things had died out. But maybe if we restarted, i could try to be more paitent, and more willing. We barely talked over the summer because we were both busy with our jobs, but i'm back at school now with him. And I felt like our relationship lost something so I asked to break up. I feel like I might have given up too easily..

    • Well I support you in giving it another try. I just hope he doesn't think you're pushing him to forgive you so quickly

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