Should I ask out my ex? Please give me advice?

We were never 'officially' dating, but we had an on and off thing for a year and it was pretty intense/crazy/dramatic/complicated - its a long story. After a lot of drama we are now 'okay', he knows I still love him and I know he doesn't feel the same, but due to our history we still have a connection or this certain bond between us and we know each other better than anyone and we still care about each other - at least I think so.
The thing is that I am moving to another country in a month to go to university and even though we see each other pretty often (mutual friends), I want to ask him out for a coffee just to have some alone time with him and a chance to say goodbye properly - with no expectations whatsoever I know where we stand with each other. However I don't want to seem desperate for his attention or like I don't realize that it's over and he just started seeing someone and who knows maybe he will have a girlfriend by then and stuff... this are my doubts and worries that it could come out a bit awkward if I ask him to meet me. But I really feel like I need this last alone time with him and to say goodbye properly before I leave and like I will regret it if I don't because he really means so much to me.

So should I do it or not?

((Once when he was drunk and I said I missed him he also suggested the same thing that we meet before I leave, but I'm pretty sure he doesn't remember or if he was serious about it.))
  • Yes
    Vote A
  • No
    Vote B
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Most Helpful Guy

  • There are many pluses to meeting him.. First it will be atest of whetherj you'd have really accepted the finality of breaking up.

    Second, it will bring emotional closure to both of you. A final meeting will lay the doubts and ghosts

    Third, it will confirm for you the reasons you are saying goodbye.

    Not to mention, it's the normal polite way for two exes to part for a long time!


Most Helpful Girl

  • Just go for it. If you look silly then at least you tried haha. Just try it :)

    • yeah thats what I've been thinking. better risk it than to later regret not doing it.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I would say absolutely ask him to meet up; I do disagree with others on just keep it friendly - I would say start off with that, but in these kind of situations with the emotional build up and tension, let it go wherever it seems to be heading - which I imagine will be romantic; one last hurrah kind of thing.

    Make sure you guys get any closure that you may want/need - if this could potentially be your last time seeing each other.

  • I think you should just do it. As friends. And see how things go. It's better not to overanalyse and just be clear about the fact you're going away etc.


What Girls Said 0

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