Help Me Understand, Men?

Why is that *some* men, when you treat them well, get very lazy... but then, once you cut them off because you got tired of being put last suddenly they wake up? It seems like some guys actually enjoy being in the dog house.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Most humans are like this, they take things and people for granted and then when they lose those things or those people they suddenly wake up and smell the coffee.

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    • Yeah, exactly.

    • I take nothing for granted.

    • Neither do I, and this is why it's hard to understand why it is we have to be pushed to this limit as a result of people with the 'take if for granted' attitude.

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What Guys Said 7

  • I think because a lot of times, women don't make it clear what they want, or let the guy know they're unhappy. So the guy is doing his thing, the woman is treating him nicely. As far as he knows, everything is fine. Suddenly, you blow up at him and now he's scrambling to try to fix what's wrong when he had no clue.

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  • they got into the comfortable zone and get used to it and your patterns easily. they don't realize what is really happening and hardly think about what is going on in their partners head because things are smooth for them. generally speaking.

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  • When you say "lazy" I'm assuming you mean stop putting in effort to go on dates and but you things and stuff like that. If that is what happens then he never enjoyed that stuff to begin with, and only did it for you anyway.

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  • Don't forget BurnetteNYC, everything's has balance. If you want something, you need pay, if it's cheap isn't good.. Think about your favorite food, if you eat every day, you know what's going to happen.

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  • Yes, but some men are dogs so it's perhaps very fitting :)

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  • If you are doing something to lose your self... they will enjoy it... SO find your self and always say NO... you will see a different men front of you.

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    • I sure am... cut him off on FB 2 days ago, blocked him today. Been keeping very tied up with work (as always) and now having fun with new friends. I won't be 2nd, 3rd or last meanwhile he expects me to be there and put him first - idiot.

  • Human nature is we want what we can't have. It sounds like you are doing the correct thing.
    I am not a fan of my own gender as they don't seem to try very hard, but we do get slammed hard when things go wrong.
    If you treated me well I would not be lazy, but I have never been treated well and work like a dog (very hard).
    Now divorced I hope I choose more wisely next time.

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    • I love being supportive, giving, warm and making my guy happy and feeling appreciated frequently. To be made to feel as if I'm being taken for granted and that he could care less isn't what I signed up for. It's hurtful plus it offends me, not exactly what I aiming for.

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    • Probably was spoiled by his mom lol but sometimes, like what you've conveyed in your initial response, we give too much and are open but some people are too selfish and dense to keep it equal. So yes, me too, looking to choose more wisely next time and find his replacement.

    • There are two kinds of people in the world... givers and takers. You are probably a giver and you need to find another giver. Then you may have a balanced relationship. Men have the same problem in finding this kind of match but it is important.

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