What are we to each other? A future? Someone please help?

So my ex broke up with me and we seem to have this weird whatever u wanna call it. He even had a rebound gf right after the breakup they didn't last long less than 2mths. He still had my photos on his phone, still k. i. t with me but I was aware he had his gf so we kept it respectful. We still eat lunch together (work together) wait for each other to walk to our cars when leaving work. He still has his moments where he throws hints at me about our breakup such as "i can forgive but cnt forget" or brings up what I did wrong during our relationship. He hasn't texted me like he use to but we did hang out last week which we hadn't done that since our break up.. yeah I said break up. I've tried to tell him I miss him n wld like to work things out but he tells me I hurt him n at the moment he doesn't feel the same way. However, when we are alone he has kissed me before and gives me a hug. Someone tell me where cld this be heading? What is it that we have? I miss him and love him like no other guy.. id marry him in a heart beat :(


Most Helpful Guy

  • this dude sounds like he has no problem reciprocating the attention you're giving him and clearly if he's giving you that much attention and affection he's being disrespectful to his gf. i'm not sure what you did to hurt him, because he stills seems butt hurt over it. what i would do if you already haven't is apologize in a very classy manner and subtlety sneak in a line about how you you still care about him, but you're making your own decision to try and move on since he A) doesn't know what he wants B) is still butt hurt towards you.

    all of this of course should be classy and avoid using the term butt hurt lol

    the most powerful thing you can do is walk away and mean it.

    he calls... take your time responding
    he contacts you more frequently... ignore him for a bit.

    make it clear you're only interested in working on a relationship rather than letting him have his cake and eat it too. girls do this to me all the time. cut it off and he'll respect you more for it in the long run.

    • Well he's no longer with his gf he ended it with her less than 2mths.. during the time he was with her he still seemed like he wasn't as serious with her as he was with me because he still never fully let go of me meaning he still seemed back and forth now he's single and I've told him again how im sorry for hurting him but didn't mean to he's still like "yah sure.. well u did" so I'm trying to give him his distance but I'm afraid he might walk away.. to me tho sometbin has to still be there.. as we speak he kissed me today and gives me those hugs like he misses my company (I work with him) so see him all the time. . he even waits for me at the end of the day and walks me to my car

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    • 15 months, and before that my last relationship was 3.5 years. same thing happened in both. except with this last one i really saw her as having the potential to be the one. she just lost interest in me because i was struggling to find a job in my major and this close friend of hers got promoted at the volunteer ambulance corp they work at. so i could see where the attraction shifted. but learn from my mistakes though, always keep the interest high and sometimes you gotta fake it till you make it in terms of getting what you want even if you do want to text him non-stop. its called self respect

    • Hey I just saw ur last msg... how are you and your gf doing? Did you'll get back together?

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What Girls Said 1

  • Ugh soo annoying. Not you of course :) but the situation all these hints of love, kindness and care but yet the status of what your ration ship is unknown.

    This is tough because you don't want to come off to strong but don't want to worry about him walking out of your life.

    This sounds like you guys are already back in a relationship to me. I don't have lunch with my ex he doesn't kiss me and we don't go out together. If you feel uncomfortable about what's going on, be honest with him.

    Now answering you second question, maybe your his cruch. When you have a crutch you need it to help you heal but nobody wants a crutch because it's a burden. He needs you to help him continue his normality ( because you guys to see each other a lot) and/or for mental and physical pleasure but doesn't want you because he said you did hurt him. I suck at metaphors. I hope you get it... Can you go in detail of what his thoughts were?

    • Yes you are right on where my thoughts are that's y I don't know whether to move, stay? as for his thoughts lemme begin by saying he tried for a whole yr to get with me (he wasn't my type my friend convinced me to give him a chance) my friends said i was like his trophy gf.. n he offered me the world if he cld he treated me like a queen. . however my past insecurities got the best of me n I was afraid to love fully.. but I regret not showing him more even in the simplest things.. however it started going downhill when his friend saw me on a online dating site and he told him (I had that profile b4 I was with him) but I didn't take it off because i wldnt even get on it.. well since than he was heartbroken n didn't trust me but he gave me a chance but 1 day he went through my phone n saw guy friends text "hey beautiful" etc and he assumed the worst n Said I'm a cheater n a coward for going behind his back

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    • Hey girl.. so I just saw ur last msg.. lately I have tried to distance myself a bit.. i no longer text him all the time and now he txts me every night for the past week on his own.. he tries to kiss me and last time I told him "friends dnt do that and you no longer can do that" he says "ugghhhh ur right" he still attempted to kiss my cheek than kissed my mouth. I just have to work on that area to be stronger

    • Well I'm glad. It's hard. Chile I'm still struggling with my breakup, but I know exactly what I want. You should too, you know what you can take and can't take and I'm sure you know what you like and don't like. Don't except and thing less, and definitely not anything more because then you're not in control.

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