How do I get over it if I'm the rebound girl? I started dating this guy a month a go and he told me he had a year old son so I asked how long had he been split from his ex as his son was so young he told me about 3 months. So I asked if he was ready for a relationship so soon he said yes as it had been a long time coming breaking with his ex and we both agreed we'd take it slow and see what happens. So we meet and start dating and everything was great but he seemed to be moving it at a pace a lot quicker than I expected. Wanted to meet up 6 times the first week and saw him 3 or more times the other weeks. Introduced me to his eldest son and mom and talked about going on holiday and even made a date for us to take his son out together. Then he started to back off. He wasn't txting me as much as he did before and it got to the point that he was ignoring my texts so I asked what was going on and I still feel like I pushed him now. He told me he wasn't ready for a relationship, that his son couldn't handle us together (there were issues with the son and his ex), that he thought he was ready but he wasn't. Even said that he didn't want anymore children and didn't want to stop me from having them. Bare in mind I don't know if I want kids and this was 1 month into seeing each other and I already knew he didn't want any. I feel like he was blaming me for pushing him into a relationship but it was him doing all the leading I was just happy at the mo to take things slow I told him this and I didn't hear back at all and haven't heard from him since. I'm gutted and I don't know how to get over it all I wanna do is talk to him but I don't feel I can that if I try an contact him he'd just ignore it. I obviously have developed strong feelings for him when I tried to stay guarded. Maybe he just isn't interested and used that as an excuse but how do you get over being the rebound when you care so much for them?
Most Helpful Guy
Day by day. And, by realizing you were not at fault. He initially misrepresented himself, intentionally or unintentionally, by stating he is over the breakup with his ex. And, by consistently reinforcing that by spending an usual amount of time with you, given the short time you knew each other, and introducing you to his family and social circle. Thus, you eventually trusted in him. It could happen to anyone.
By the way, the statement, "there were issues with his son and his ex," in my opinion, means he and his ex are not entirely over each other and, or perhaps are contemplating reuniting. Parents who are no longer together but still have feelings for each other will often take issue with their children being introduced to their co-parent's significant other. But, who knows, there could be many reasons behind his decision.
That being said, going forward, consider it a red flag when someone wants to move things along quickly with you. I believe, at least, they are fleeing from something or someone, or they are very much insecure or dependent. Relationships should progress at a natural pace.
For now, occupy your time in new and other interests.0