i dont know if anyone can give me any good advice but i need to try something as i am going out of my mind.
basically I've been with someone for 3 years, he is the most perfect boyfriend to me and an amazing stepdad to my 5 year old i could ever ask for but over the last 18months i have been fighting with myself over wether im happy or not in the relationship, we have spoken many times together about this aswell. weve had probably about 6 breaks that have lasted about a week and he really is like my best friend but im just not physically attracted to him does that make me shallow? it hurts me so much to see him cry but does that mean i should stay and be unhappy just to make him happy. i really dont know what to do :(.
Most Helpful Girl
Well, you can't force yourself to be attracted to someone if the attraction is just no longer there. You shouldn't stay in a relationship you are unhappy in just to make the other person happy. That's not fair to you and it's not fair to him either. These are always difficult situations but I think sometimes people need to be a little selfish when it comes to relationships. If you are no longer getting anything out of this relationship, then it's time to move on. Just because you aren't attracted to him romantically anymore doesn't mean he's not still an important person in your life.
You just probably need to end things and then, hopefully with time, he can still be in your life, just fulfilling a different role as "friend" instead of "boyfriend." It would be great for him to still be involved in your child's life as well. I just feel like if you aren't happy in a relationship with him then there's nothing you can do to force yourself to be happy and it's probably a sign that the relationship has run its course. It will probably suck for a while but I think eventually, you will realize that it was the right thing to do.1