Boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me and says he doesn't love me anymore but calls and texts all everyday?

my boyfriend of 4 years recently broke up with me a month ago. He said he still wanted to be friends and the first few weeks he would ignore me but recently he has been calling every night to say goodnight and he texts me during his lunch break. He also asks me to wake him up for work... It sounds like he still loves me but what confuses me is that he doesn't flirt with me or call me any cute names like "baby". he's just kind of stiff... and when I try to initiate flirting he tells me to stop... It makes me even more confused when we hang out and he's all touchy feely and will occasionally put his head on my shoulder. AND whens its time to say goodbye he hugs me really tight and gives me a kiss on the cheek... I feel like he's trying hard to hate me even if he cant... like he's trying to hide that he still loves me bc he's too stubborn to admit it... or else why would he keep such a close contact with me alllllllllll day? please help


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  • He fell out of loves, but he still cares for you. He feels bad about having to hurt you, and old habits are hard to break, like hanging on you. I would tell him that this is painful and confusing, that you need some time and space to adjust and process. He needs to decide if he wants to be "just friends" without all those GF perks, like you being his alarm clock, because that's just using you, or he needs to figure out if he actually wants you back. But I wouldn't take him back, not when he's being flaky and hurting you like this.

    • I know what you mean but can you explain to me why he got me a bday gift and wants to spend the day with me? :/

    • Either because he still cares, or he's trying to keep you around, because he doesn't want to lose the perks of your friendship, but don't let him take advantage.

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