Why is he mean to me then asking me back?

Broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years after he started messing around behind my back, staying out all night and began taking drugs after starting a new job at a restrauant, meanwhile I was going through a cancer scare. 3 months later he convinced me to give us another go saying about how he loved me and wanted only me etc, we began dating and occasionally I'd stay in the flat we once shared until he told me one night he was tired and could I call the next night instead, when I called the next day I discovered he had spent the night with a girl from work and had been messaging girls off a dating site inviting them round for sex even messaging them when I was in the flat with him. He had other girls saved under different names in his phone and had basically lied about a lot of other stuff so I blocked all contact until he was able to reach me through Facebook and basically blamed me saying it was my fault and I turned him into this lad who doesn't care about girls and that if I treated him right he wouldn't need to have looked elsewhere, even telling me that he has had 44 girls since we spilt, yet after these messages he will ask me if we could start fresh again etc I'm so confused! I'd never go back there but I can't help wonder what's going through his head?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Humm this is one of those things where I would almost need to hear his take. I doubt you were responsible for much of it. Something about you might have triggered it but he is the one who let himself get to the point he is at. Also that is a pretty big jump in personality so that is pretty curious. I wonder if he did these things before you met even just a little. Cheaters like that normally do not just pop up they have been doing it forever. If he cheated once and it was out of emotion then it would be different that is just sex drive and that doesn't change or get worked on.

    Here is the deal he probably does have feelings for you but he is a boat load of a mess. If he tries again tell him if he cares about you being happy he will stay away because he is only hurting you.

    • Yeah he was arrogant before I got with him but I managed to see the good in him and we had a happy three year relationship with normal ups and downs, I just don't understand why one minute he takes joy in telling me he slept with someone last night and then the next ask for me back and to start fresh, it really is frustrating and confusing but I think you're right in that he needs to leave me alone and not get in touch, thank you

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    • Yeah he did have self esteem issues but he always had an arrogant streak, I guess I just need to move on and let him continue to sleep with sluts as he commented that he was "being single and getting his numbers up" before he asked me to get with him and "start fresh"

    • hey who knows maybe someday he will change and settle down but right now he is not the guy you need and so I agree you should move on and find someone who will be dedicated to you.

Most Helpful Girl


    Blaming YOU for turning him into A JEARK CHEATER. Please.
    What's in his head is pure shit, I'll tell you that. So fucking immature.

    • I know, apparently I didn't give him enough attention, this is a man who is 28 years old!

    • Just like women, men wants lots of attention

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What Guys Said 1

  • Because he is a doucbebag that's why, fuck the guy and don't ever go back to him. He is unfaithfull.

    • P. S. Don't fuck him literally

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    • If he makes you feel worthless he is not worth you. Find someone that appreciates you :)

    • You're absolutely right!

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