When an ex says they 'can't be friends', is that like saying ' I can't be around you and not f*ck you'?

same as tittle. still too short.


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  • I think its a combination of things, for many its I still like you and will want to date you again but I dont want to work on our issues like an adult so my heart will only get broken. Or you willl not work on our issues so my heart will get broken.


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What Guys Said 5

  • Ahahaha, you so silly. You think that's why? because we can't handle being arround a girl we used to love, without fucking her? come on, give us SOME slack at least.
    No, it's because he loved you, he shared everything with you, probably also been intimate (judging by your statement)... thhat makes it hard, because every joke he make reminds him of the past, every time he hears you laugh it reminds him of the past... It's because no matter what you do, there will always be that bittersweet sting of knowing he used to have you and you used to have him. And no matter what he does, it will never be the same old. Being intimate... will make everyting weird, because both of you will look at eachother well aware you've seen the other naked, knowing what you've done together.
    Going above and beyond friendship changes the rules... and you can't really change them back.

    That is why some chose to move on. Because the constant reminder of the past is too much to handle, and because it'll make it feel weird, and fake.

    Then there are thhe cases where the breakup was messy, and one of the parts simply can't stand the other, so they shut the other part out of their lives completely.

  • When a man has strong feelings for you he wants to be really close. He does not want to be a friend held at arms length. It is less painful to be away than to be tortured.
    This says a great deal about how he feels. It also says something about how you currently feel about him.
    Only when the feelings coincide do things work out.

  • Likely that is one of the meanings. Or "If I can't fuck you, I don't want to be around you"

    • i think its motte like they can't handle it. rather than a calm decision.

      anyhow, is that what you would mean?

      i mean i get it. i think for me its not sex per se but just touching intimately in general. if you're still into sopmnerone its hasrd not being able to do w/e it is you like doing lol

    • Right. It could be either. Depending on how into the girl I was.

  • Or they can't be around you and not love you.

    • yeah thought of that but friends can and often do love each other, so...

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    • that makes sense. there is a difference between friend love and partner love. otherwise everyone would just be in friends with benefits for life ;)

    • Sex and love are not connected. If you've shared enough of a connection to be an ex, it can be really painful to look at someone you used to care for so much and think of the good times and know you'll never have them again.

  • Or that you hurt them too much for them to be friends with you.
    There are lots of possible meanings, not just those 3 or 4.


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