My boyfriend just broke up with me & I have 1 chance to make it right, what do I do?

we've broken up before because of my insecurity but he always took me back cause i'd cry & promise i'd chill out... this time its different he said it became too much & i strained it to the point where he doesn't want a relationship with me at all & he is no longer in love with me (which he has never said before)... that nothing i say will change it & he will never ever want to be in a relationship with me again... he says he still loves me and cares for me but has no desire to be with me.

i know you never beg a man but it worked before so i cried but this time it didn't work, after like 20 mins of crying he usually gives in but... its been 2 days & his whole approach is different... and he said after tonight we can't speak anymore cause he wants me to get over him.

i left a dress by him last time i saw him and he is bringing it for me on Saturday... after 2 days of trying to reason with him i got him to agree to hang out on Saturday when he brings it & i said that if for the entire time we hang out he doesn't feel any connection or even a slight bit of a second guess that i will finally just accept it and let it go (which will be very hard) chances are slim but a chance is a chance... he has around 3 days to chill off from me... im not going to message him or bother him.

i just need any ideas... i wanted to do something to let him know after a bunch of crying wolf i am ready for this to work... baking a cake isn't going to cut it & going overboard will ruin it... i dont want to spend money he won't like that & its sleazy... i dont wanna do too much sappy stuff... but this is my last chance to stop the love of my life from leaving for ever... what can I do on saturday? words won't cut it... i may not have a shot in hell but i have to try

he used to be inlove with me.. think i was his soulmate...& my insecurity isn't from him but a previous relationship... he is the one. please help.
Updates:
we live a bit far so we dont see each other as often.. haven't see him in 2 weeks... thats why i feel like seeing me would maybe bring back some feeling...

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Most Helpful Guy

  • You ever hear about the Juggalos? Insane Clown Posse? When someone screws up they yell out... You Fucked up!.. You Fucked up!.. You Fucked up!.. You Fucked up!.. You Fucked up!

    I'm not trying to be mean or hurt you, but why don't you re-read your post as a guy and think about if he would want to be with you for any reason? Sure, maybe a sex slave and keep you in some basement with a gag on your mouth. But would a normal guy want anyone like you describe in your post? The only one that would stay with you is a sick guy.

    Why don't you print out your post and pin it to the wall. Forget trying to lie to your ex any more. Send him an amends letter and say he was right. Send him a copy of this post. Confess it all to him and make your peace.

    Thank him for being your bf and putting up with all that crap for so long. Re-read you post every so often as you shop for a new guy. Do a 180 with how you treated the ex. It sounded like you had a nice guy and you F'd up... many, many , many times. Accept it, change if you can and reinvent your love life a fresh. I know this is not what you want to hear, but unless you change... nothing else will change. Good luck!

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    • I hear you... and believe me I agree & so would my ex at this point. It's a disgusting display of desperation and motion & i resent myself for it. He says i'm not the girl he met who he used to fiend for and just wish i'd message him. I fell in love... I became too availible & i let the insecurities caused by my last relationship cost me to lose the love of my life. logically i know i can't make him love me again... I did fuck up... because i pushed him so far away he has 0 desire... but i just want to try for the sake of it... a gesture or whatever... he agreed to it.. I know that very well could be because i promised if he said he felt nothing i'd leave me alone... but this guy used to be at his knees for me... can he really see me for "the last time" & feel nothing? isn' t there SOME part of him i can appeal to?

Most Helpful Girl

  • apologise for the way you acted say you realised you made it hard on him and say you are sorry and it won't happen again as you have grown from this experience and it has made you a better person, ask to maybe toan your relationship back down if possible, go back to the early stages of dating so you can have a fresh start on your relationship again and try to relearn stuff about each other as if you have just met for the first time

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    • i did all of this... we were on the phone all day today... i cried & said this a bunch of times... but his response was that i've said all that before & i did not change

    • well that's because you showed him that you hadn't. You need to stop the crying as thats what is sending him away and stop all the begging as it just makes you sound despreate

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What Guys Said 1

  • Who says this is the love of your life? You're still young as shit, you have your whole life ahead of you, literally. Get over this guy and find you another one, because he's clearly done with you. Why try and get someone back, that doesn't want you back? Waste of time. Go out, party, have some fun and forget about all of this.

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