I still want her back?

My ex left me over a month ago. We were dating for over 3 years and we have a child together. Not even a week after we broke up she starts sleeping with one of my friends. I know that's her way of dealing with whatever is going on in her life. She has given me every line in the book about why she left me. I'm not to sure what to believe now. However I do still love her and I've tried doing Everything I can to not love her. This love won't go away. I want her back. I don't know if I should go ghost and make her miss me, try being around her and flirt, or try and make her jealous. She is the love of my life but she's not being herself right now.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Back off. See your child as much as possible. Rediscover yourself. Don't wait for her to realize her mistake. You need to concentrate on you. If she comes back than good, if not than at least you'll be in better headspace.

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    • That is a good look at it. It's alittle hard to give her space because so much of our life's were tied together.

    • Time to become your own person. It'll be hard but I know you can do it. Message me anytime you doubt yourself :)

    • Thank you

Most Helpful Guy

  • Of course you want her back. You care for her. She is the mother of your child. The breakup is a unilateral decision and one you disagree with, not to mention it is fairly recent and unintelligible from your point of view. This, unfortunately, has likely influenced you to act upon your emotions.

    Despite your protests, though, she prefers to move on from the life she had with you. Wherefore, I strongly you suggest you take a step, or two, in the opposite direction as her. Given this, if you are ever to have a relationship with her again, in my opinion, what you voice... and how you act during this stage of the breakup is highly consequential.

    Having said that, considering her stance, I simply suggest you give her the necessary space she needs to miss you, and to decide if being with you is what she wants, while focusing on yourself of course. Elseways, you potentially stand the chance of pushing her further away.

    Generally speaking, women lack respect and desire for guys who pursue and wait for them as if the guys, otherwise, have no life of their own without them.

    On a side not, I must say you appear to be a bigger man than myself. I would not want to affiliate with an ex who slept with one of my friends directly following our breakup. No judging here.

    Good luck to you.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Please just hear me out on this. DO not have any relation with this woman at all please. Except to talk and see your children, she could've done a variety of different things to deal with her anger or frustration and sleeping with a friend is below the belt! Plus that "friend" of yours isn't a friend because if he was truly your friend he wouldn't have slept with your ex. Ignore and get rid of both of them they are clearly disrespectful to you and your feelings which isn't cool. You're on this website really geniuinely asking for help because you care about this woman and love her. But please its not worth the pain of her accepting you and then cheating again over a fight you two had. Just get another woman who appreciates and values you. please because i witnessed my step aunt and step uncle go at it all the time because he constantly kept cheating on her over stupid fights they had it was horrible and my cousin she was depressed. So please dont do that to your children, if you break up now they dont have to see you two fight in the future.. Hope I helped.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Going through this now, but with no kid or three years.

    The bottom line is you want her back because she wants to be there. I'm coming out of a brutally one-sided relationship and that eats you a part like no other.

    I still love and care for mine deeply, and only want the best for her and that she accomplish goals and grow as a person (thats really what love is wanting the best for the other person)... But honestly since she broke up with me in an already VERY one-sided situation begging, or trying to lobby your case on why she should be with you is not a precedent you wanna set.

    I'm not saying don't interact or work on it, but you want her back because she realizes you are worth that you know? I'm hoping mine figures that out. That I'm worth something, and she can make the case on why she wants me in her life. But if she doesn't then in the long run its better to be with someone who will feel those feelings for you, and not force it or carry a relationship on your shoulders. I tried and its VERY hard especially with an uninterested partner.

    Good luck! It sucks but day by day, and remind her of happy times, work it slowly, and hope she finds her way.

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