Girlfriend of 8 months broke up with me because I want kids and she doesn't want any more?

I am a 25M and she is a 30F that is a mother of 3 children. When we met she had been in an abusive relationship and was starting to put her life back together.

We were both able to communicate with each other and never hid anything from each other. The intimacy on a physical and emotional level was great. We fought sometimes but every couple these days will have a tiff.

But she started to stress and freak out when I talked to her about the topic of another child. Because when we started dating I asked her if she would be willing to try and have a baby with me in the future. Because at my current point in time I am not ready to fully support her and her three children. But eventually it came out that she does not want anymore kids because she has been through childbirth enough to know what it does to her body. She then told me she wanted space to think about things and sort out her thoughts.

So I gave her space for about two weeks and when we got back together she said that she could not be my girlfriend anymore because she could not deprive me the joy of being a father and having my own children. I know I am only 25 but the connection we had I truly feel is genuine because I not only love her but I love her children as well. It makes me feel bad because the children especially the youngest 2 year old daughter has become really attached and started to see me as her father. My ex even tells me that she asks for me everyday as soon as she wakes up in the morning which truly breaks my heart.

I honestly don't know what to do at this point, just move on and try to find someone new or try to make the necessary life changes so that she hopefully gives me another chance. I really do love her and her children and the bond that all of us share together. Any thoughts and insight are greatly appreciated


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Most Helpful Girl

  • She has already had 3 kids and doesn't want anymore, so I would guess she just wants you to have the chance to have your own children. If you gave up on having your own, maybe she'd take you back, but it just doesn't seem fair to you :/

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Most Helpful Guy

  • well it seems like she has been through a lot and she has already lived her life of having her own kids, I understand you want your own, but that is a choice she does not have to make with you. it seems like she was trying to do the right thing by you knowing she won't be able to deliver your hopes and dreams. if you want kids, then find someone else who wants kids. you trying to make it work with her might just be time and effort wasted. she already has 3.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Rethink the need for having your own child and just see hers as your own, if you can do that, then tell her, that the connection you have to her s more important to you than having your own child.

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