So this is something I need to get off my chest. Something I want to share really. My friends and family don't know the full extent of it?

We went threw hell before we could even b together. And once together it got worse. We were addicted. Both addicted to drugs and addicted to each other. And wen we eventually lost completely everything including our home and u wouldn't think it could get any worse. Well that's right, it didn't. It started to get better, things started to look up. He's done some unforgivable things threw this awful period but I loved him and couldn't walk away. I wanted to forget and move forward. Literally as we were about to move into a new home after being homeless. The relief, the security, happiness started to slowly ease it's way back in. My guard started coming down again and for once I believed in r future. Too good to b true? Yes that's right. All of a sudden the rug was ripped from underneath me. It had all been a big fat lie. My bubble burst. He was seeing somebody else for a long time, saying sweet loving things to her, meeting her, having sex with her. It has completely crushed me, broken my heart into a million pieces. Battered my confidence massively and I'm a shell of the girl I used to be. Yet here I am trying to move forward WITH HIM. Trying to forgive. Fearing life, fearing the hurt another human can inflict upon me. Desperate 2 be on my own and strong, independent like I used to be. Not living in this cage of emotion, paranoia and control. I always believed even threw the hard times that we were meant to be together and this was our life path, we'd come out the other side ten times stronger and the best couple ever. How wrong was I. Now I believe he was a big life lesson 4 me. A huge one that I'll always keep with me, threw every relationship and every opportunity, every scenario I will remember what he has taught me. And then the fear really kicks in because I know the biggest and hardest battle of them all is looming and I have 2 leave the man I love. I have 2 leave and take what happened with me and ensure he's not the 1st in a long line of soul destroying men

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Most Helpful Guy

  • This is tough and heavy. But you are young. There is no soul mates. There are soul mates. Sometimes we think that love should be the strongest we can feel. But may be it isn't that healthy to love that strong ! Life isn't a destination... the happiness you fight to create every day. Every day is a challenge , you can either not start it.. do your best and fall middle way.. or win it. And this is every day.

    Dont hate men.. but don't make them the pivot of your life.

    wish you the best

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I just read your sad story, sweetie, and I am so sorry for your pain and many heartaches... you surely have not had it easy and it is Not always Easy to love someone unconditionally... especially when you put so much effort into it, endure so much together and had hoped and prayed you would be these two birds of a feather forever...
    Now that it is over, you need to put your guard up once again and think of yourself, lick a few war wounds that have ended badly with the War of the roses and the long battle you fought. I always believe that everything that happens in life is in God's hands and what Happens to us is in our best interest, whether we accept it or not or cannot understand it.
    Many of us have had curve balls thrown at us and with this, it makes us stronger many times and makes us realize what to do and not to do next time, should something or someone come along in our direction.
    Take this time to do some soul searching. You have been on one helluva ride. But it is a lesson in life and in love that nothing is ever a guarantee but death and taxes and perhaps Old Mother Nature had her own motives in mind when this romance that you fought to keep glued together, fell apart and now it is time to move on. With ending up going down a beaten path, the road as rocky as it seems now, will someday clear a better and more lighted way for you.
    Good luck, God bless... you are strong, you will find your way again... xx

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What Guys Said 2

  • He cheated so leave. And also, no drugs would have solved a lot of your problems. At least you know now the effects of drugs. Yes life is hard and good on you for picking yourself up.

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  • You. Will. Be. Fine.

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