Is groveling bad/unattractive to guys?

I really really liked this guy I was dating. I think that things did not work out for various reasons... timing was probably a major one, rushing things didn't help either.

Over a week ago I texted him b/c I hadn't been hearing from him much lately. I asked if he wanted to grab a drink. He said for sure :). I also told him if he wanted to stop talking that I understood if he'd lost interest (something like that, not quite worded that way). He said he was definitely still interested.

Last weekend I hadn't heard from him.. I texted him and he said he'd found someone else, but that he thought I was awesome, hilarious and that he really enjoyed getting to know me.

I sent him some not so friendly text messages about how I felt about the whole thing... I felt kind of led on! I had no idea he was seeing people on the side and that I was just one of the girls he was trying to decide on.

Anywho, I went on a date last night and it was just... no good. I shouldn't compare, but I totally did. I still like this first guy despite everything that happened. I don't even know if he's really dating someone else or if he just said that... ahhh.

I know this is silly and sounds sad or desperate, but I want to text him and tell him how much I like him... and that if things don't work out w/ whoever he is seeing I still want to see him again. Is that awful? Worthless? Worthwhile?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Why give him that satisfaction? So he finds someone else while he sees you and when he gets burned from her he can come back to you? You're getting screwed and giving in. Let him miss you if things go south.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • That's a difficult question. If you do, keep it short, simple, and to the point. Maybe something simple like "text me if you're single :)".

    • I'm pretty sure he's not...

    • Show All
    • Then you move on with your life. If it's meant to be it will be; if not, you will one day find a man that will make you completely forget about this guy.

    • I should move on... I don't know what I was thinking this weekend.

What Girls Said 2

  • I think there's a fine line between groveling and being really really sweet. And perhaps texting him is a mistake, but wouldn't you rather make that mistake than miss out on an amazing relationship with someone you like? You have to risk things in order to gain anything.

  • Give up now. Don't text him. You'll regret it. There's too many more guys in the world for you to go through this over him. Move on love.


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