What to do when boyfriend stops talking to you after a fight?

I have been with with this guy for a year, things were going great at the beginning until recently where I felt he stopped making an effort which was making me upset. For example he would make an arrange with me for us to meet then what he does is he would cancel me and I am thinking why would you arrange to meet up if all you were going to do is to cancel it. And this happened few times in a short space of period. Anyway to cut the sorry short I got very upset one day and had a go at him and told him how I feel about the relationship and how he is making me feel. He didn't say much as he though things were going great between us and he couldn't understand why I was feeling the way I was. We then stopped taking. Then I though let me be the bigger person here so I have tried to reach him out after 2 weeks to find out what is happening and to talk like an adults as I didn't closure and wasn't too sure the status of my relationship. When I called he didn't answer and then I left him a text message saying to call me back when he gets a chance but no reply. I was very polite in the text as I was avoiding to say an emotional stuff. I really want is to talk to at least get closure for me to either move on or work things out if he is willing. I feel so hurt and would like to talk to him to find out how he really feels so I know where I stand, that would give me a peace of mind I believe which is crucial at this stage. Please advice on what I should do moving forward?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Eh, this behavior sounds fairly familiar. Has he seemed distant for awhile? If so, has it steadly gotten worse? Does he just seem indifferent?
    Something happened he's not tell you about. And it likely involves you somehow. After 2 weeks of no communication, he may be looking for the relationship to just die off. If that's the case, whatever was bothering him was bad enough he's emotionally detaching himself from you, if he hasn't already (FYI, a lot of guys do this when things happen they don't want to talk about). Could always try to find out, but this is a good ecample of Hope for the Best, Expect the Worst.
    Your call. Good Luck.

    • He has been distancing himself from me and started spending more time with his friends, I'm not even a cling girl, I've got a very busy schedule but when I agree to see him I make sure I see him, all I said to him was if you make an arrangement with him don't mess about as my time valuable as he thinks his time is. He didn't argue with me while I was addressing the issue and all he kept saying is "I don't know what to say to you I'm shocked you feeling this about us" honestly I deserved to have a Closure and explanation if he wasn't feeling the same way about the relationship specially when I have invested 1 year of my life.

    • Guys don't distance themselves without reason. Whether or not he tells you depends on why he did it. Chances are his friends know why. You can ask, in the interest of closure, or to try to work through it. But if he's acting this way, he's probably thinking it was over already.

    • Thanks a lot, you right there is definitely something he is not telling me about but how long can I keep thinking about the past and why he is treating me like this. I would have appreciated to know the truth even if it is not what I want to hear now. Its so hard but I will try to forget about him in the meantime

Most Helpful Girl

  • Well firstly your reason for getting into a fight was valid. You can't be happy in a relationship where one person has to do all the work. He stopped making a effort as you said and now his actions show yet again, that he is not willing to make any effort on his side. You need send him a text telling him that you want to meet up asap to have a conversation with him in person because you want to know what's going on. Also mention that it's the right thing to do considering you've been together for a year and that you deserve to know what happened. If he doesn't reply again then you need to find closure on your own and if you struggle to do that, just take a look at the way he has treated you now as a example. Actions speak louder than words and in this scenario his actions have really shown that he's not interested in anything, not even in answering your phone call. What kinda guy does that anyway? You deserve better and you know it.

    • Thanks darling for the advice, I don't get it who does that to someone they've been with for a year, that's very disrespectful of him. I'm sure I will move on

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  • I have no idea why you guys wouldn't have talked for two weeks! that's a long time just say if you wanna be together call me back and if you don't... well at least be nice about it and still call me back i'd like to know


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