The Breakup from Hell (reuploaded and updated from a one month ago)?

My ex broke up with me 2 months ago. We were together for 4 months while we were away in an internship program. I fell in love with her.. however, there were trust issues from my end caused by different forms of communication. We constantly misinterpreted each others stuff and i already have issues dealing with emotions. So one night, she decides to end it after I send her a full text saying that she’s gonna break up with me. She said that she couldn’t trust that i’d get better and she couldn’t deal with this anymore. I broke down and cried and begged…and she stormed out saying “it’s over, deal with it”. I texted her later on that night, apologizing for losing my cool and saying that I agreed with her. That night I found this sight and began my 30 days and “healing process”. 2 weeks later, I texted her “hey”. no response, and i had to start my process again. Keep in mind that this whole time, I was still friends with her on Facebook, tumblr, Skype and linkdin. 3 weeks later, she unfollows me on tumblr and unfriends me on Facebook. 2 weeks later, I messaged her on Facebook talking about Dr. Who, a show I started watching because of her. I said “Just finished the first series of Dr. Who. Loved it :) How are you doing?” A day later, she says “You need to stop communicating with me. I don’t want to hear from you anymore. I unfriended you and if you keep this up, I will block you”. I apologized and said “block me if you want” and boom, she did. Some friends have even told me that before she unfriended me, she was looking at my Facebook a lot. However, I’m officially in constant pain from this whole ordeal. I want her back and am following the steps, but the healing process is taking long and I've failed classes in school and work. She has removed me from Skype after i blocked her a few weeks ago. I've gotten really depressed, downloaded 8 dating apps, have gotten with my exs, feel so isolated... any advice?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • wow, this seems like a very complicated situation. She may be the kind of girl who simply can't have contact with anyone she is trying to get over. She very well could have been in love with you as much as you with her and the break up probably hurt her as it did you. I can't say for sure but that's what it sounds like. I say you should keep your distance for her sake and respect for her. I understand break ups are so hard and you are hurting but everything happens for a reason. Keep your head up maybe in the future you will both have grown and reached new levels of maturity and work out something then. but for now keep focusing on yourself and making yourself happy. Good luck to you

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    • its just been hard to heal. its also affecting other parts of my life and my friends... my plan was to contact her late January or February , but even by not saying anthing for a month... i've been so hurt and depressed because i lost a lover and best friend...

    • please cheer up and remember the pain is temporary. at least you did get to experience a great relationship even if it was short. it may not be what is meant for you and only time will tell what is but for now keep yourself busy. try hanging out with new people, go out on weekends, join new clubs or groups. hey you might even run into her and she could be impressed with how you are trying to change your life around. stay positive!

Most Helpful Guy

  • Realize that women aren't that important. No girl is worth more than your happiness and peace of mind. Focus on developing new skills, hobbies, getting better at school and work. Those are infinitely more important than a girl. There are are billions of women on Earth, it's almost impossible not to find an untold number of girls you'll get along with. Focus on yourself for now. Start valuing yourself, and the best way to do that is to become valuable. Don't speak to that girl again, she's toxic for you. Start asking out other girls too, but date just for fun, don't get into relationships, and try to see multiple girls, it will teach you not to idealize one person.

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    • I've tried dating other girls and its just not felt right. like i said...8 dating apps. While I agree that there are plenty of other fish in the sea, i lost a close friend as well.

    • 8 dating apps is bullshit. Go out in real life and talk to actual women.

      And you've mourned long enough. Start valuing yourself a little more. Stop letting women be the most important thing in the world--if that's what you are thinking about all the time, that's what you think is most important, by definition. Is she really all that? NO, of course not, haha! She's just a silly girl!

      Focus on other things, find new friends and just have fun. Stop being so serious about girls. Dating is supposed to be fun and light--if it isn't, time to stop for a bit and get a healthier attitude before you do it again.

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What Girls Said 1

  • I think that this break up is now effecting most aspects of your life- you self esteem, education, work, friendships etc. I think that now is the time to seek professional help (in the way of a councillor or psychologist), to help you to refocus and get you back on track. At the moment, your whole life evolves around this girl, and you are more than that!. Most universities, schools and colleges offer free counselling to their students. Take advantage of this service!.

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