I don't get women at all. Do they always expect to get chased?

When I ran into a ex a month ago at an event with mutual friends, she approached me and it was very friendly. I was happy about that because I hate having enemies. However, I took this encounter at face value and did look too much into it. Therefore, I did not pursue again.

5 weeks passed and I saw her again. This time, she seemed much colder to me. We kind of avoided each other the whole night.

I don't like approaching exes because it may be perceived as creepy. Also, when I tried to be friendly to my last ex, she suddenly turned and went nasty on me (I later found that she heard I was dating other girls. But, so what? The ex broke up with me, said we can remain friends, and she seemed to be flirting with another dude in front of me). So, with the current ex, I decided to never contact her or approach her.

This current ex is very attractive and is not used to guys breaking up with her like I did. She and my other ex also told me that they both have their own exes calling and chasing them from time to time. Hearing this makes me not want to be like those exes so I therefore do not chase.

But, do women get upset or frazzled when guys kind of ignore them? If so, is this because women get hit on all the time and get chased my exes, and therefore think it's weird or insulting when a dude, especially an ex, suddenly doesn't take interest?

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What Girls Said 1

  • She made the first move to re-initiate contact (whether she's interested in becoming friends or re-kindling the relationship, I have no idea).

    You say, "I don't like approaching exes because it may be perceived as creepy."

    Did you consider that she may not have approached you the second time because she wasn't sure if you'd want her to? She may not be sure if you were happy to talk to her the first time, or you were just being polite. By leaving it up to you to approach her the second time, it would let her know if you were you interested in re-establishing contact. Perhaps she didn't want to be perceived as the "creepy ex".

    "do women get upset or frazzled when guys kind of ignore them?"

    Sure, some do. I just wouldn't assume that that's necessarily the case. She obviously didn't have a problem with approaching you first when the two of you saw each other the first time.

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    • Thanks.. well, I did wave to her and gave her a brief embrace. However, at one point at the party, when I almost walked into her, I darted in the other direction. Maybe that was not the smoothest move on my part. But, I don't like to bother women, and I had a really bad experience when I tried to be friendly with my other ex. I realize the two women are not the same.

What Guys Said 1

  • Women collect men, can't stand the idea of a guy who isn't into them. Just keep ignoring her, she just wants your attention, not your affection.

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    • Thanks, dude. That's why I acted how I did. This is a very attractive women who gets A LOT of attention. She told me I was only the second guy in her life who dumped her. She broke up with all three of her serious exes and they all keep wanting her back.

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