I slapped my boyfriend for the first time in 7 1/2 years!!

We got into an argument and I slapped him, I don't know what came over me, I've never slapped him before or never thought about doing so. I'm not a violent person at all, I have apologized over and over again. But he isn't budging and I can't blame him. He still wants to be apart of my daughters life ( her real father is not in the picture and she loves my bf like he is her father) and I am okay with that. I've tried talking to him but all he can say is he doesn't know what to do about it. I feel horrible!! Advice please and thank you.
Updates:
Well I have continued to apologize, and i brought him a gift as, well. He had 1 conversation with me and that was about a dental appointment he went to. Other than that nothing has happened. Keep in mind everyone i am not someone who goes around hitting men. I've never done that until a week ago. I felt horrible the second i did it and still do.

0|0
811

Most Helpful Guy

  • You crossed a line. If I were him I'd stand my ground too. If he just let that go without consequence, it would continue or get worse. How would you feel if the roles were reversed and he hit you? Immediately he would have the stigma of a wife beater. Why should it be okay for a woman to hit a man?

    However I do believe in second chances but I am not him. I think that maybe he is making you realize what your actions could cost you and will come around eventually and give you a second chance. Unless your relationship is rocky and this is just the straw that broke the camels back. Don't only focus on the slap, make sure you deal with the issues that lead to the slap.

    2|0
    0|0
    • He is bipolar and we have had a rocky relationship but have grown a lot better in the recent years than the earlier ones. As I said I am not violent, I don't know where that came from. I feel horrible and have acknowledged my mistakes and have told him. I understand his point as well. I just wish there was something that I could do to make it up to him to show him how sorry I really am.

    • Show All
    • Oh well, I hope you figure out how to message me

    • Guess you still have not figured out how to message?

Most Helpful Girl

  • You got violent with him, that's a line that should never be crossed in a relationship. You have already apologized and I do feel that you are geniunely sorry, however, you can't make him accept the apology. From here going forward, it just depends on him and how he feels. I would say to just respect his space right now. Give him some time to figure things out.

    1|1
    0|0
    • I knew the second I did it, my heart went into my stomach. He got angrier, who could blame him. And I left and have not been back since. I owned up to my mistake and have apologized and times I have talked to him on the phone and he doesn't feel like talking I respect his wishes and leave him be. I sent a text every morning for the last week saying my apologies. I really do feel horrible, Like I said I have never done this before. To anyone.

    • Yeah, I understand that you're sorry, but put yourself in his shoes. He probably just needs more time to sort things out in his mind.

Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 10

  • give him time. if you want a relationship with him tell him you want to prove that you aren't the person who resulted to physical violence. but ultimately if he decides that he can't be in the relationship then you need to respect that decision

    0|0
    0|0
  • I'd certainly not focus on the fact you've slapped him. You've apologized and probably, if you do it again in a day or two that will come to rest. You love him and he'll feel that.
    The main issue is the problem for which you don't find a solution. So if I understand it right your daughter loves him as if he would be her father. But he doesn't want that. Correct?
    I'm a but mixed up by the word "apart". You didn't mean "a part"? Since that's exactly the opposite...

    0|0
    0|0
  • And he's still your boyfriend? Sorry not to be rude, but I wouldn't stay with a woman if she slapped me in fact she be luck is she did get hit back. Fact is it always starts with one slap and the person saying they're so sorry, it'll never happen again, and I don't know what got into me.

    0|0
    0|0
  • It isn't okay to slap your partner, as you already know. That being said, anyone can snap of a second and do something they truly regret. Man or women we all end up saying or doing things we regret.

    After 7 1/2 years I think you should have earned a chance to work passed this single slap, assuming you really do regret it. I am guessing your relationship must have deeper issues, and this slap was just the final straw. You might suggest couples counseling and address the deeper issues you are facing. If you show that you are committed to fixing the problem, and not just ignoring it, then he might be willing to consider giving you another chance.

    0|1
    0|0
  • It happened. You apologized. Shit is on him now. You can't do a damn thing.

    1|0
    1|0
  • It honestly depends on what he did and why you felt that the reasonable response was to slap him.

    Alas, physical violence is *bad*.

    0|0
    0|0
    • I know it is bad, I have been in an abusive relationship before where I got my butt kicked and handed to me by a man before and I got out. Then I met my current and we've had our problems especially him being bipolar and I have dealt with so much over the years and have always been the one to pull him up then this argument happened and I slapped him and feel horrible. No I have never done this before to him at all never even threatened it.

  • Gotta just respect his wishes
    you done as much as ya can

    0|0
    0|0
  • only one slap? nah... no big deal :-P

    0|1
    0|2
    • one slap is one slap too many, wether it's dealt by a man or a woman.

      But yes, it's not a "big deal" if they can work it out and not do it again.

  • give him more time. you can't pry at him.

    0|0
    0|0
  • If it were me I would have thrown you on the ground and kicked you... then dumped you if you didn't beg at my feet

    0|0
    2|1

What Girls Said 7

  • Like most people said, you crossed the line.
    However, you sound like you're genuinely sorry about it. That's a good step.
    You need to be patient. Like you said, you can't really blame him. Imagine him slapping you during an argument. Would you find it easy in your heart to forgive him?
    I'd say give him some personal space and time.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Well yes that's a line that should never be crossed in a relationship. It's not right for anyone to hit during an argument and I'm guessing he's thinking if this is going to be your way of how you react when not getting your way or if you're indeed going to seek help. If I were you I would give him space but don't blame him if he wants to call it quits since I would leave right away if a bf ever slapped me.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Can he slap you?
    I don't understand why women these days need to resort to this. Yes you did it in a fit of anger but I am sorry this is not justifiable.
    You may have to give him some time to cool down and never stop apologising. I wld be mad if I were him

    0|0
    0|0
  • Looks like he was asking for it ;)

    0|0
    5|4
    • looks like his bipolar triggered you to slap him... what else can i say again? he was asking for it anyway

    • Show All
    • You must be the type of woman who thinks it's okay to smack men around just because you're a woman.

    • Hopefuldreamer8 - No I wouldn't have to. I don't choose to be in relationships with people who have mental illness.

  • You should tell him how you feel about all this

    0|0
    0|0
    • I've tried, to the point where I was sobbing on the phone with him, he listened but kept his ground. He is so angry with me right now, we have never been this bad in our relationship. We have had our times like everyone but in 7 1/2 years this is the worst that has ever happened. And I feel horrible.

  • give him some time and sex in this situation will be great for him, seduce him

    0|0
    0|0
  • You shouldn't have slapped him. Maybe he thinks that this will happen again if he forgives you. It's obvious you're sorry but that was line you never have crossed. Saying sorry doesn't mean he's obligated to forgive you.

    0|0
    0|0

Recommended myTakes

Loading...