Should I let her go? would that be the right thing to do? would that be what I should do if I truly love her?

You see, I've been courting a girl for almost a year and a half now. she had been hurt terrible by her ex-boyfriend and she wanted to move on, I gave her time to do so before I started courting her, she admit that she loves me too but she said she's afraid that she might get hurt again, or she might not be able to love the way she use to before because of her devastating break up a few years ago. there is a saying that if you love someone then you should let hem go and respect their decision and let them live their lives as they wanted, that true love is to learn to let go if that is what they want.

is that what I should really do? should I stop making her fall completely in love with me? would that be the right thing to do? would that be what I should do if I truly love her? even if in the end it will hurt me, but her happiness is the most important thing right? even if I ended up hurting myself in the process. sacrificing my own happiness for the sake of hers. I would gladly do that, but should I really let go?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • She said she loves you. I don't think you should let her go. I don't think this is what she wants. I think she simply wants to know you won't hurt her like her previous bf. And I think she wants. you to be gentle and attentive, that's it.

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    • Yes, I know that. she said that she loves me but she said that the only thing I could to help her is to let her go, and that I should stop pursuing as it will be just harder for her. its just that, even though all I am doing is helping her, it seems that I am just hurting her more. as I said, if its the only thing to help her and make her happy. then I will gladly gave up my own happiness if it means I could see her smile the way she use to do. it hurts for me to know that she's hurting but it hurts me more to know that I am the reason she's hurting more.

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    • Thanks for MHO!

      And good luck with this girl. Whatever you decide to do about this whole situation, I hope it will be a good thing for both of you.

    • thank you for your kind words.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Anyone who can only focus on their own feelings should not be in a relationship. When you are truly in love you put your partner first and they put you first. Everyone has baggage it's how you deal with it that matures you as a person. So to answer your question if she cannot move on from her past and put you first in her life then she will not truly love you as you do her. Hope I don't come off as an asshole and I hope that helps!

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    • I know, and no harm done. its ok. that's why I decided to help, I love her but me loving her and pursuing her is just hurting her more. how could I be with her when all I am doing is just adding to her pain. If I had to let go just so that she could move on and be happy, then I'll gladly give up if it means that she could be happy. it will probably hurt me knowing that I can't be her lover, but the fact that I could remain as her friend would be enough with me. as long as she's happy.

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    • I see, I understand. thank you very much.

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