Should I still go to our trip (to New York for New Year's Eve/ Birthday) with my ex after breakup?

My ex-fiancé and I have been together for over 4 year and engaged for 1 year out of the 4. She and I have been back and forth with breakups and makeups throughout the past four year. She has even left me before a few days before Christmas a few years back. We have also going to couples therapy for the past year since I found out she was speaking and seeing her ex-gf. Well since last year we plan this trip to go to New York for New Year’s Eve to see the ball drop in Times Square for my 30th birthday (new year’s baby) with her best friend and her best friends girlfriend. Well just a month before our trip we got into a big fight that was so bad I put my hands on her. I know I was wrong in doing that and should have never do it even tho I have done it before. Well now she wants to continue to go on this trip just as friends for 5 days and no talk of our past and absolutely nothing about our future. She doenst want to speak to me and asked that i give her space to find herself. She has stated to me that I crossed the line and I know I did. She has even told me we are over for good this time and would never take me back. So im not sure if I should even consider going on this trip still. I know this has been one of my dreams as a little girl to see the ball drop on New Year’s for my 30th birthday. But at the same time I know I am in love this woman and deeply want to work things out but she has made it clear were only going as friends and once the trip is over we don’t need to speak again. What should I do? Please help


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  • maybe she quit being a lesbo and got staright :P

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