We were long distance and I found out last night that in May he cheated on me while drunk, and then again he did it several times with one girl from his school (he says they didn't go past 3rd base).
He started begging me, said he's an alcoholic, he's embarassed, and he really wants to fix it and have me give him another chance. he swore to change his ways and get into a better place, stop partying, let me see his phone any time, he says he will do anything to be with me.
What do I do? At the time he cheated, we were fighting like crazy. I was kind of a bitch and acted crazy, overcontrolling, etc, because I had a feeling something was going on-- but Im not making excuses for him. I love him, we've been together almost 2 years now, and I'm torn. Is there ANY way a cheating relationship can EVER recover? How? WHat exactly does he have to do to rekindle it?
I'm not his GF anymore, but I'm deciding if I should be his friend and help him through this point in his life to get him back on his feet. But once he does, I don't know if there ANY small possibility we can be together. Any real advice would help.
Most Helpful Guy
in my opinion once a person cheats regardless if it was sober or drunk (a cheap excuse really) the circle of trust is broken and that circle isn't once that's fixed with sorries and promises. It's always easier to apologize after the fact than to do the right thing in the first place. in my opinion you should completely ax him from your life, this is an unhealthy relationship already, even as friends you would only end up falling for his games in my opinion its best to move on be single for a while heal, find yourself, and maybe find a local guy that will be in a trustworthy mature relationship with you. sometimes its better to let things end and move on to a fresh start. I really hope the best for you0
Most Helpful Girl
Nope. He doesn't deserve a second chance. Not as a boyfriend and not as a friend. Alcohol is NEVER an excuse for cheating. It's simply impossible to justify cheating by saying shit like "oh I was drunk so it doesn't count". Uh, yeah it does.
He's only embarrassed because he got caught, and not because he actually cheated. In a healthy relationship, you should be able to trust your partner without constantly having to go through their phone and their chat messages.
He's basically not worth it. If he respected you as a person and respected the relationship you had, he wouldn't have cheated. Ever.0