It's been barely two months since I broke up with my girlfriend of three years and sometimes I feel miserable.
We broke up in the worst possible way and I am sure she suffered as much as me, if not more, and since then I did all I could to be a better person.
Yet when I think of her I feel a gnawing sense of guilt and shame; I think of all the pain I gave her and of how bad a person I had become and feel the need to cry.
In my experience crying relieves the pain while also making me somehow more vulnerable, and I had decided I would not cry again if I could help. Because there are much worse things to cry for like when I lost my loved ones so I promised myself I would be strong. At least until the time to cry would come and tear away my shell of endured pain.