Why do I feel like I just kicked a puppy?

I've been trying to get my friend of 6 years to date me, things were going well until she started talking to her Ex. he's going to visit town and she wants to see how much he's changed. Naturally I'm not happy with that being push aside because there's still a chance with her Ex.

So I told her that I'm not happy with that and I wouldn't be around for her to see if things could be fixed between them or not. She starts telling me that he wasn't himself when he hurt her, yelling at her and abandoning her, that it was because he was on drugs and trying to kill himself. That just made me even more worried, when I worry about someone I mostly just bottle it up until I'm a shitty and mean friend.

The last thing I told her was that we can't talk anymore if he's going to be in your life. I feel like I kicked a puppy and that I'll never see or talk to her again. I told her that I would give her time to think. I just don't know if this was the right thing to do. On one hand I know my limits, that I can't handle worrying about her with a guy like him. On the other hand I just want to see her happy.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Friendships are a two way street, especially if you want to date her. You're doing damage control, and you're saving you. This is rough, and it's not going to be easy. Sometimes, doing the right thing is the harder path. You're choosing the right path; stay strong.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Wow you should see a guy like that as competition you should see him as a serious threat to your friend!! You've been her friend for six years and you're more worried about a guy like that pushing you out of the way when should be worried about how he manipulates her!!!

    If that's really the situation you are a shitty friend and you should feel bad!

    She needs a support network right now so she doesn't fall in with that guy again. If you're a good friend you need to tell her you're sorry and you don't want to see her sucked into a bad situation and focus on being a good friend to get her through this.

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    • I actually have been supportive of her for a long time.

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    • I know, I could have written this a lot better. I didn't mean for it to come off as "She should be dating me!!!"

    • Well then what did you mean to communicate

  • Oh brother... some girls really have a gluttony for punishment... lol the sex must of been good... lmao, that really isn't fair because he was gone, they broke up so it's your chance to date her now, she's making a huge mistake, her loss i guess, she can't do that to people she's beibg really unfair.

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  • You made the right call. She is still in denial about her ex and doesn't realize it. If she loses you this might make her think.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Good decision, don't feel bad about it. While she doesn't owe you a chance at dating, and you certainly have no say in who she dates, it's perfectly fine to tell her that going to someone with his history will alienate you. You don't have to stick around or deal with someone making poor decisions. You gave her a reasonable proposition, and if rejects it, it speaks volumes about her.

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  • so you made someone sad and thats why you feel bad

    ... is that it?

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    • Pretty much, I'm kind of just venting.

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    • Maybe 10 years ago, isn't the new thing tumblr?

    • you dont need a tumblr they will find u and rape u on tumblr if you post soppy shit

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