Why does my ex bf hate me?

I need some serious advice because I can't handle feeling this way. I basically lost my boyfriend and my friend. two for one special, eh? So, when I first them, they were dating. Then they broke up and he started seeing someone else and he and my friend were having sex while he was still with this person. I then found out he had had feeling for me for quite a while, I was skeptical because of their history together. Long story short, I gave him a chance, fell in love with him, but I was still uncomfortable & he would tell me that he didn't think she was entirely over him, but he said he only wanted me. Then one night I decided to snoop (I know, never a good idea) and I found messages between them after we had gotten together & he was talking sexual towards her, and she to him and he also said that he loved both of us and he'd settle for just me. I confronted both of them and he claims he was drunk & doesn't remember, I apologize for snooping and everything seems fine, we even go on a week long vacation. I make little remarks about her here and there and one day I just snapped and called her a whore. He wanted me to talk to her and tell her what I said but I just couldn't do it. My anger went away though so I figured it was fine. I apologized to him for getting mad & he says "don't worry about it, I love you." Well, the next I find out he's told her everything I've said and she's really hurt. He's pissed at me, and dumps me, blocks me on everything. He even told her parents who probably hate me now too. He says what I said was unacceptable and that I crossed the line and what I did was going beyond a mistake and that they should just be forgiven for those messages because it was a weak point for them, and it was a few months ago. She's unfriended me and says she doesn't wanna be around me either. Am I really that horrible of a person? I've barely slept or eaten and I keep crying. If he loved me, why would he not be willing to work it out? Is this all my fault?
I noticed he unblocked me from fb about 2 weeks later, so I figured he wasn't as angry. The day he left for basic, I sent him a text saying "Just wanted you to know I hope you have a safe trip" & he replied with "I told you I don't want to speak to you I will file a restraining order if you message me again" he also went to a local restuarant that we frequented & told the waitresses that I'm crazy. What did I do to deserve this treatment?


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What Guys Said 1

  • They have used you as an excuse for their bad behavior. They are not nice people at all. Let it go and move on. Yes you can do it.


What Girls Said 1

  • Move on... he was never in love with you accept the reality. You don't deserve to be with a guy like him.


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