So there's a few questions in this..
How do you react?
"Ignore her, seek the opportunity as a chance for revenge, talk it out "
Best approach methods for success?
Background story: So me and this guy, really cool friends freshman year. I guess naturally feelings developed, I was clueless so I guess you can say he was friendzoned at the time.
I found out the following year, though not through him but through his friends and gossip. I ignored it, "I've never been one for gossip". But than it started to irritate me, I tried to talk to him about it on like 3 separate occasions. Two of my more direct attempts were ignored. My indirect attempt however was not but I chickened out.
ignored it some more in hopes it would just go away.
"It didn't", in fact it got worse once enough people found out I found myself being attacked by random people he knew artificially judging me "Jealousy I guess", I ignored it
By the end of the year I had so much pent up anger from being disrespected. I simply made a list of people of people I needed to make amends with for whatever reason.
Let's just say it didn't end well...
i mean I thought I was pretty nice about it but I recently opened up to a friend and told her bits of the situation and what I said
Her response: "Damn girl, you tore him to pieces and left him with nothing", I can see why that didn't go over so well
Fastfoward: Junior Year "my god, yes.. I'm still dealing with this" Can't believe it...
I was really under the impression that he would just get over me, everyone would just get over it, life would go on but it didn't
infact I moved away just to recollect myself, I had other personal issues on type of him, but still even with distance, no contact, drama, everything I said. He still feels the same way
His friends are split still.. Some still very vocally disapprove, others are coming around and some are just like makeup already
I thought if we ever were going to have a talk, It'd be best face to face, so now's a good opportunity.
I'm slightly worried, I'm kind of infamous now more than before, so this is of course a risk.
I'm not sorry, for what I said or did.
But my delivery could have been better and it really wasn't an intention for him to be hurt
That and the fact that I'm going back to campus means someone has to be an adult here, I guess it'll be me
You're right on so many levels
He has yet to meet me half way
& I'm a damn good rare friend
After a day of deliberation and events,
I was reminded today why I left and also that I'll never probably be seen as good enough by his friends "yes they still give me shit" without even knowing me
With that being said, he can continue to suffer but there's no reason I should too
I'll think hardly about this 4 try, my last serious message went unheard apparently
Most Helpful Guy
The fact that he still have feelings for you really sucks and as much as you didn't want to ruin your friendship, it did somehow by not returning his feelings towards you. I get a gist that you countlessly tried to explain to him. but he just can't just get over it. You gave him the time and even move away for him to recover. I honestly don't see any positive outcomes from this; he will always resent you for not feeling the same way he does. He probably thinks you were misleading him in a way and giving him signs that you're interested in him in any way, but that usually is just in his head. People often dilute themselves into believe that there is something there when in reality, there isn't at all. I'd approach it very cautiously either way, but you shouldn't really expect too much from it. Just know that you did what you could do to salvage your friendship.1
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