I was 16 and I was pretty suicidal, I just wanted my life to end so bad. I was in my first year of college and there was this girl in my class. Me and her started talking, I completely opened up to her and we both instantly fell in love. I never felt this way for anyone before, I just knew she was the one for me. She was the reason I didn't end my life.
Me and her lasted from the age of 16 to 20, I was the one who ended it. She was constantly lying to me, putting me last, she wasn't being the girlfriend I fell in love with. 5/6 months later me and her was going to give it another go until we had a huge argument at hers. She was being anti social so we had a huge argument. She brought my self harming into it and told me I don't cut deep enough (basically saying bleed to death next time) and then she almost pushed me down the stairs. We eventually sorted all that out but what she said to me the night before completely sank in and I realised she isn't the girl I fell in love with because she was never once that nasty to me throughout the relationship but I still wanted her back.
I wrote her a song in January and I finally got to sing it to her 2/3 weeks ago and she cried, she clearly still as feelings. She now has a new girlfriend (who was the reason we split up) and yet she was still sat there crying on cam. If apart of her didn't want me at all no tears would have formed right?
She was the reason I chose my second University choice because she didn't want me moving away, I actually wanted to go to my second University choice. The week before I started University she decided to tell me she didn't want to give us another go. So basically she led me on all summer, guilt tripped me to choose a Uni closer to home and then completely destroyed what was left of me before Uni.
Her new girlfriend treats her like shit, everytime I try and let her go she'll message me or something. It drags me in.
Any suggestions in what I can do? :(