What's the best way to end a relationship that seems to be bordering on emotionally abuse?

My partner has always given me the silent treatmrnt for 3 days after a fight. Not just fights, but when he's upset about something. Thing is, he expects me to be the one to initiate a reconcilation. Last time it happened was because he was disapointed that I wasn't into something he tried in bed. That night he was acting like a d*** off and on. Later in bed, he covered my mouth and nose and caught me by surprise. When I finally reached out on third day, he pulled the,"I haven't heard from you either, I'm ok, are you ok?" Then he explained that it was his experience that women liked it. And he didn't think I was trusting or game. He claimed that I never seem willing to try new things, which was completely untrue.
Recently, we got in fight where he misinterpreted something I said. He wasn't satisfied by my explanation and was being accusatory, angry and unreasonable. I asked him if he wanted to break up. And he just said that his view of me is negative at the moment but it might be good to talk in person. Then he let me know he was home safely from work and said goodnight. Nothing since. I haven't reached to him because I'm looking at the whole relationship and seeing a patterm where every month he's unreasonably upset, feels justified in acting like an a**hole, and we don't talk for 3 days until I initiate. I'm just not sure how to break up with him. I feel like he has the upper hand because he felt justified in being an a** while I was trying to remain calm until we could talk later. It doesn't seem like he plans to talk to me. So is best it to just let things lie (don't reach out) or call him up and try to talk to him about the pattern I've been seeing and how I feel? I think he must be abusive though so part of me thinks that would only make things worse.


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What Guys Said 1

  • i guess "sorry we cannot continue anymore" is the best and more polite way 2 say it basically...;-)

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What Girls Said 1

  • Be strong and just tell him you dont want to see him anymore. I am so concerned for you with this man - firstly he sounds like he will become physical abusive since he has tried to smother you alrwady. Secondly, the emotional abuse will destry yourself esteem making it harder for you to leave. Do yourself a favour and get out of the relationship and find yourself a nice guy who will treat you with kindness and respect.

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