Was dating a guy... he wanted to move faster than I did. I really liked him so I moved at his pace. Everything was good for a couple of months. We spent a lot of time together, went on trips, met family. The only thing I noticed was that he was really insecure. I think he was constantly worried that I was going to break up with him at any minute. The week before we broke up was pretty emotional. It was on again and off mainly because of his insecurities. We went to a concert where he was entertaining some clients. I had a little too much to drink, got into an argument with him. Basically, I embarrassed him in front of his clients. I felt horrible. On the way home he told me that he fell in love with me and he couldn't believe I had done that. It wasn't all my fault by the way but I took responsibility. He broke it off the next morning and told me to never contact him again. I didn't. I left him alone and a couple of days later he started reaching out to me. He said he can't forgive me but he doesn't want me out of his life. He kept insisting we be friends on Facebook? I told him no. If we can move forward, we need to cut off all communication and move on. He got really upset, told me to go away again. Then he sent me another friend request on facebook? He won't even meet me to talk but he still wants me in his life and still wants some connection to me? I know at this point that things aren't going to work out but its driving me crazy trying to figure this out. He says that I'm turning this around and now I'm the one leaving him. He said I was easy to fall for but hard to get over. He sent me some song saying that he was going to make me miss him and he won't be that easy to leave. He broke up with me! I told him that I wasn't going to play games and to not message me again. He emailed me a song last night about how he is better as a memory than as my man? LOL What in the world is going on with this guy. Please help. Thanks in advance!
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This is most likely a by-product of his insecurities. He wanted to be the one to leave you - the fact that he could leave a pretty girl because she disrespected him probably made him feel like he was a 'somebody'. But you accepted it, as you should, which completely undermined his power play and has now turned what was initially something that would have made him feel good about himself into something that is now making him feel bad about himself. His backtracking and attempts to win you back into his life push him further and further into a cycle of rejection, and he will want you to come crawling back to him to end that cycle and make him feel dominant again. It is a mind game, and he tried to bluff and lost.
The thing is, you have been handling this the correct way. You need to NOT be friends on facebook, you need to not communicate. You need to cut each other off and get on with things. He is probably continuing to try because the door seems open a crack. You tell him to stop, yet you seem to respond when he does something. That will just encourage him to keep trying so he can 'win'.
I would suggest cutting ties completely, blocking him if you have to, not responding if something gets through, and just moving on. He tried to be the dominant one, had it flipped around on him, and now he's scrambling to put himself back on top. And he will keep trying until he succeeds, or until he realizes he's blocked and you are not playing his little mind games any more.0
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