How to break up with someone who truly loves you over text?

Breaking up is honestly the worse thing, i really don't know what to do. Me and my boyfriend have been going out for 8 months everythings perfect. I didn't tell my parents that we were going out until yesterday because i was scared of their reaction as my boyfriend isn't the same ethnicity as me. I truly love him so much and he loves me back equally, however my parents don't accept him as he isn't my ethnity. My parents are quite old minded they want me to be with someone as the same ethnicity as me. They told me to break up with him as much as it hurts me to do so, i'm gonna have to respect their decision. I've already had a talk with my boyfriend about the consequences if i do tell my parents that they won't be happy and that if they tell me to break up with him i'm going to have to respect that but i'd try my hardest to convience them. I can't bear to tell him face to face or over the phone. I want to text him instead but I don't know what I should say or how I should break up with him. What's the kindest way of telling him about the break up, I don't to loose him completely his my best friend i would always love him. I want him to know i appreciate all the time we've been together.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You'll have to do it face-to-face. He deserves at least that, since he's basically getting dumped for no real reason. It's not like he did anything wrong, and as you said, everything's going perfectly.

    If you really love him, though, you shouldn't listen to your parents. They're not dating him, YOU are. I'm sure their opinion means a lot to you, but if you break up with him just because they tell you to, you're letting them make a decision for you that isn't in your best interests. You'll both be unhappy without each other, you'll likely end up resenting your parents, and you'll feel incredibly guilty for breaking up with him and leaving him to wonder if he did something wrong. It's a lose-lose-lose situation.

    What you should do is sit your parents down and explain a few things to them. Tell them that your boyfriend is a good, caring person and that he would never intentionally hurt you. Give them examples of how happy he makes you. Let them know that you value their opinion and would never want to disappoint them, but that being with him makes you truly happy and he encourages you to do well in school and to become a better person (or something similar that you genuinely believe). This isn't a high school relationship with an older bad boy or something; he just has different beliefs than you and your family. It's nothing to break up over.

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What Guys Said 9

  • Tell him face-to-face if you can. It will be hard, but it would be best for both of you to dignify what you had with a face-to-face discussion instead of something as impersonal as a text. He will want to see you at least for that last time, and in retrospect, you may find yourself wishing you had too.

    I'm in a very similar situation myself, and were it to end, I would rather it ended that way.

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    • Doing it by text will leave him hurting, wanting answers, wanting to speak to you one last time. Don't do that to him, or to yourself. If you can't go against your parents' wishes, then have that discussion with him. End things with a proper goodbye.

    • My GF has expressed concerns about her parents' approval on account of me being an American. For all I know, I'm talking to you right now. It's ultimately your decision, but if you don't think you can do as @singlegirl1992 says, truly your best option is to speak face-to-face.

  • Your letting someone else determine your happiness. If ur happy with him then stay with him screw your parents screw everyone else nothing else matters as long as your happy. Everyday people look for happiness and everyday they find it and everyday they let it slip though their fingers. And they spend a life time repeating this. Don't waste a life time searching for something you already have or looking for something that's right in front of you. Don't let anyone determine ebbs the makes you happy! Only you know what makes you happy.

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  • Your 18 - 21 and you can't make your own decisions? News flash! Its are job to piss are parents off. If they don't repect you and your decisions then they are in the way. Wake up and smell the coffee... O_o

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  • "Dear John, my racist parents won't let me date you no more, and they > you."

    There's no easy way to tell him this, but doing it via text is just insulting!

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  • Are you Greek? Sounds like something my parents would tell my sister.

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  • After reading that, by text, really?
    Your cold as ice

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  • stay classy

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  • I can't even comment this is so hurtful

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  • Dude, don't do something like this over text. It's the cheap way of getting out of things simply because you can't handle a little discomfort or awkwardness. People deserve to have this sort of talk in person.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Just tell him that. Then walk away

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  • Hey dont leave him , you guys seem so in love , you are not going to spend the rest of your life with your family but with him , just run away and get married :D , or tell them you have him baby inside u

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