How can men move on so fast?

Well I was with this guy for 3 and a half years and I new him for 4 years. We broke up only about 3 weeks ago and with in 4 days he joined tinder (witch is a dating app) I found this out because we wear still living with each other and I saw it whilst I walked past him. Then I was also told he had joined plenty off fish aka (POF) witch is another dating website I found this out through a friend as she was just causally browsing and come across his profile. I then questioned him about this and his reply was we are not together but he had no intention off meeting anyone and did not no tinder was a dating app, Cough Cough Bulls**t
Ino this sounds bad but as we lived together and used the same laptop he had left himself (clearly by accident) logged on facebook. So being the curious ex I had a little browse on his facebook and ended up in his inbox and to my surprise he had been messaging a girl basically begging her to come round to his new place when he moves out like WTF!! Excuse my French.
I then being a women went into detective mode and was able to log into his POF and found that he was telling all these girls they wear beautiful and everything else. Well half off them wear to put it politely not very attractive girls im not trying to say I am perfect but I don't get why men move on so fast and to such horrible looking women.
Also during all this time he was doing this he was telling me he still loved me and wanted to take me out on dates to see if we could rekindle our relationship. I don't get it its like did he ever love me because I know myself I am not emotionally ready to even try move on and probably won't be for a good few months.


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What Guys Said 2

  • if I could you guys have been in a relationship for so long I can honestly tell you that he does still love you and he's trying to jump into a rebound relationship so he doesn't have to deal with being alone we have someone to talk to you and have sex with and go out and do fun things with he could even be trying to hurt you but that's for you to decide I don't know him but I can tell you that I've been in this exact same boat I broke up with my ex and maybe a week later I was dating somebody else and having sex and it was just for the fun of it was a good relationship and we had a lot of fun but after a month or two everything came to a screeching halt when I found out how this person really was when I saw that I missed my ex and I love my ex and one day I saw her and we hit it off immediately that my girlfriend and got back together with my ex I'm not saying that this is going to happen with you that sounds awfully similar just pretend that you don't care start working on yourself be happy go out with friends even flirt with other guys even bring one home but don't do anything with him if you want to get back together it just shows that other people do want you and if he actually loves you he'll show it trust me and if you just really trying to move on but at least you'll have work on yourself to make yourself happy and gone out and done things and had fun instead of sitting at home being miserable you might meet someone better but it'll take time instead of focusing on how long focus on getting in shape learning new things meeting new people and having fun easier said than done trust me it's a win-win for you

  • How long do you expect your now ex to get over it? The fact that you accessed his accounts could possibly be illegal, if it isn't already just downright morally wrong in the first place. You're acting like you two are still together. You have no business being in his business. The fact that you called those other girls horrible looking means you are a bitch. By the way, did he say that he still loved you and wanted to rekindle your relationship after you questioned him about the girls he talked to online?

    • Yes he was still telling me that afterwards and is still telling me that to this day and excuse me but im far from a bitch THANKS! Maybe a bit bitter, But who wouldn't be when there ex moved on so fast whilst telling them they still loved them. I don't expect him to take forever but not four days he always said during the relationship that he would find it so hard if we wear to break up to get over me but it looks like to me that he dose not care but yet he is still telling me he dose.
      And you could say it is downright morally wrong to access his account and im not saying it isn't but when curiosity hits someone and they want to find out they will do no matter what. And I did as he was telling me he had not be on it to message women and that he was just on it to see what it was like. Obviously a LIE!!

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    • I didn't say it did give me the right and iv learnt from my curiosity as the only thing that came from doing so was hurt. Its not that he moved on faster than I wanted him to its the fact that he has moved on faster than he has made out in the past and that he is still making out like he misses me and wants to start over again and still telling me he loves me. I get that some people move on faster than others but im just shocked at how fast someone can move on after 3 and half years off loving someone.

    • Just move on from him.

What Girls Said 1

  • Yeh snooping may not be right but I can completely understand how you feel, it hurts to know that someone can be with you for so long and then move on so quickly. Especially when you have been apart of their life for so long, I guess everyone deals with it differently and it almost sounds like he wants his cake and to eat it too, like be with you but then see them too. If he ever brings up trying things again I think you should speak to him and say look I'm aware that you are on pof and the fact that you have tried to move on that quickly whilst telling me that you still want to be with me, is wrong. I guess then you could see what he says but if it has got to the point that you have broken up, remember the reasons why it got to that point. As hard as it is, I think you should move on and focus on yourself.


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