Will no contact work in this situation?

Ok so would no contact work for my case? I met him in January. Everything was amazing since day one... I feel like we jumped into dating. 2 montes later he finds out his ex from another country is pregnant. That's when everything changed. He told me and I kept going with it even tho I was falling for him. Now the due date is closer and I can't help the situation. He is going to the Dominican Republic for a month for the babies labor. And the girl still wants to be with him or thinks they are still together. Me and him haven't been able to be too official because he says he doesn't want to hurt me since he doesn't know what can happen when the baby is born. It's his first child. And basically he wants to bring the kid here and if the mom doesn't want to then he might need to marry her so he can bring them both. Now I had to break up with him because I feel like I will end up hurt. He asked me if things would have been different would I have married him in the future! So I'm guessing he did want something serious. Anyway I broke up with him on Saturday haven't spoke since Monday since he said it was too hard to maintain a friendship. But i still have hope he will change his mind and will find another solution for this.


Most Helpful Guy

  • He sounds pretty conflicted, which makes his decision making process pretty unstable, which in turn makes your life very unsettled, which is not fair to you. As far as I'm concerned you did the only thing you could do.

    Had he said he would see the girl through the labor and vow to return, saying he had no feelings for this woman, I could see things differently, maybe. However, he said he may have to marry this person for the sake of the child to be in the states? I'm sorry, but as noble as it is for him to think of doing so, that does not make your life better, and ultimately his ordeal is not your problem, nor should it ever be.

    I think you're already hurt, which is understandable, but you did the right thing, because I see nothing but a very complicated mess that could go on for a very long time, and why in the world would you care to put yourself through something like that? I'm sure he's a great guy, but sometimes logistics make a promising relationship impossible, and this seems like one of those times.

    You're going to be much better off in the long run, but you did break up with him, and you should be willing to stand firm with that. Thinking you two might be able to work it out is nice to think about, but until that happens, you're depriving yourself of moving on and meeting someone with less baggage going on at the moment, and it's never a good idea to bank on someone changing their mind when they've already made a decision.

    I wish you good luck,


Most Helpful Girl

  • Cut contact would be best, and move on, he seems pretty settled in his words so I wouldn't think that he'd come back to you...

    You did well by breaking it off btw! :)


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What Guys Said 1

  • He will not change his mind and ur right not to get more involved


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