Am I incapable of love and monogamy or I just didn't meet the right person yet?

I am 38 years old. Grew up in a very restrictive country where people don't have sex before marriage. Had my first relationship when i was 28 with someone i didn't love ( i have left my restrictive home country by that time) . I was shy , inexperienced and didn't know what love is. and probably still don't :( I was stuck in this relationship for 5 years. Afterwards i developed depression and anxiety.. i couldn't get into a relationship with people i found attractive. I was shy , inexperienced , anxious, sucked at flirting. Very very shy guy lacking confidence.

I battled my depression and anxiety , took up hobbies and sports , began approaching girls during the day , leanred some flirting.. and.. one year ago i met a girl online who is 11 years younger than me. I liked her , but i didn't feel this wow factor in terms of looks. She is everything a man could want in a woman. Kind, supportive, educated, cute , respectful with a beautiful smile. very supportive of me . Nevertheless, she is just not the person that would draw my attention if i saw her walking by on the street The issue is... She loves me. She tells me... she always says it first. And today she cried... because i never said it first.

One part of me says.. this is the girl you want to wife. This is the girl who will make you happy and who will stand by you. The other part keeps telling me that you are not really satisfied by her, that you want to experience different women and not settle , that you will not make her happy.

We are in long distance relationship, but we visit each other and spend sometimes months with each other. I treat her wonderfully. Make her happy. Take her on adventures. But i can't help not thinking about experiencing other attractive women.

i am really confused! I didn't live a normal youth due to my culture and family. Didn't sleep around or hookup. So in the area of relationships i am probably much behind my age.

Should I leave this girl? Am I incapable of love and monogamy or I just didn't meet the right person yet?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think what you are feeling seems completely NORMAL... regardless of your upbringing.

    I did notice a couple of things:

    1) You mentioned "other part keeps telling me that you are not really satisfied by her". Relationships are not about what someone else does for you or if they satisfy you, but about how much you want to satisfy that other person. You should be so in love with this person, that you aren't paying attention to what you may be lacking, but what you can do for her next!

    2) Just because she may be they type you want to settle with, DOESN'T make her right for you!

    I think you need to let go of her. The relationship shouldn't be about what makes her look good on paper, but how you really are as a team. You are certainly missing something in that relationship that won't ever get better with time just because she does all the right things.

    The best relationships are the way you feel with your best friends. Conversations come easy. Your life goals are the same. You love being around them regardless of sex. It's just something that "makes sense" so you don't have to question it.

    I have dated a lot of "almost perfects" but always felt as though something was off... even thought there wasn't necessarily anything wrong. Then I met my now boyfriend and it all just makes sense. Everything adds up. I don't question anything in terms of if he's the right one. He's my best friend.

    I also know that LDR's are super hard and it's not the best environment to cultivate a strong relationship. I think you need to let go of her, and keep looking until you meet the right person. It's far better to be single and living a happy life vs. settling for the sake of having partner. I know it's hard to let go of relationships out of fear we won't find something better, but that's why it's important to cultivate a life for yourself that make you so happy, that you don't feel the need to be in a relationship. It becomes more about wanting to share your happiness with someone else.

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    • I think you are the most who understand me so far. And your answer helped me immensely.

      The problem is that i have never felt this'' In love'' feeling... i knew i had crushes. But what is it to fall in love? Believe me i don't know.

    • This was a great answer.

    • I'm glad I was able to help. The thing about love is, it's NOT a feeling. It's a verb; an action word. It's about wanting to do what is in the best interest of another person regardless of how you feel about them. Lust, infatuation, etc are feelings that go along with love, but are often confused with love itself. The reason you haven't "felt" in love, is because you haven't met the right person yet. I can't really explain it, but I know exactly what you are talking about because I've had several relationships in the past and thought it was love, but it took the right person to show me what love really is. Once you find the right person, you will understand. I know that sounds terrible cliche, but there is no other way to explain it that I know of.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 32

  • It's natural for anyone in a relationship to want and be attracted to others. There's one thing that makes life pretty complicated, it's called choices. You sir have a choice to make which has sacrifices.
    You can stay with this girl, get married, have beautiful cchildren. Your family will love her and everything, but a part of you will always think about what you've missed out on, though you love her. And you'll always have an urge to cheat.
    You also can leave her, break her heart, she'll find someone who really loves her. You might experience other girls, you may find that one.. however if you dont, you probably will want this girl back and imagine how life could've been with her, but it'll be too late.
    What I'm trying to say is, I understand how hard this decision may be, but life is too short to not be happy. It's normal to wonder how life would be to have this and that, but if you really loved this girl, those things wouldn't matter. She would matter more.
    If you want to explore a little before seriousness, you could. Just don't keep her and cheat. Do whatever makes you happy. Risks make life hard and exciting. (I explained your two risks.) At this point of your life, even though you may not like change or risks... it's going to happen. Make the right choice and be happy.

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  • Personally I think if you're not attracted to someone that much, you shouldn't be with them. No girl wants to be with a guy who doesn't think she is attractive, we like to be admired and if you can't do that then don't waste her time lol

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    • Thank you

    • Right... I'm very self conscious about my body. I need a man to help me with that. If he doesn't like my looks he isn't helping and will make my personal problems worse.

  • I will give you my advice, as a 35 year old woman. In life, we often don't marry/partner the most physically attractive people (as in, we may dream of someone out of our league?) but the elements that wind up making a considerate, loving and respectful marriage are present in your current long distance girlfriend. The distance is an issue, and you should both talk about how to shorten that distance between you so you can both get more time as a couple before you seriously consider marriage.

    Your girlfriend is of the age that she is looking to settle down and raise a family. If you strongly feel she is not your idea of a wife and mother, please do gently break it off with her so you both can find someone without resenting "staying" for a partner who has no intentions to marry any time soon.

    You are not incapable of monogamy but you grew up in a restrictive community and that is not bad, but it did make you late to the dating scene. The older we get, the harder it is to find a partner who is right for our goals. At our age, we look into a dating pool of people who have children, previous marriages, perhaps are jaded in their own feelings about love.

    It is time to have serious talks with your girlfriend and yourself to figure out what you want with your relationship. I think (as an outsider) if she is as wonderful as you say she is... she's a good catch and one you will build a wonderful marriage with.

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    • Very constructive, good advice

    • Thank you for your wise words. I agree. My question is... Is marriage a compromise or is it a sure feeling of finding the one that blinds us to any one else?

  • I think you want to settle with her simply because you believe it's the right thing to do (due to your religious and conservative background.) Now, that you found a girl with positive characteristics, you feel even more compelled now that this is what normal, good men at your age do when they find a good girl yadda yadda yadda.

    On the other hand, you came out of a restricting environment and with your newly liberated lifestyle, you want to experience more women because you have that 'what if there is someone better..' doubt. This is actually pretty normal for people who grew up in very religious backgrounds. You simply want to live your life now. My advice? Do just that. Don't force yourself to conform to something that you know deep down you don't want to do, you'll only give yourself pressure, depression and more anxiety. Do want you want to do.

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    • You are young but very wise. You understood me well. Thank you.

    • Thank you and your welcome. Good luck!

  • i think you should leave her and go experience casual relationships and stuff first otherwise you're going to become like one guy we had on here who asking about cheating on his fiancee because she had been with more people than him, he thought it was ok and not cheating even though people kept explaining to him that her past before him doesn't give him the right to cheat on her now.

    i say go and experience things first and then look to settle down when you're ready instead of forcing it like you seem to be with this girl.

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  • no one's incapable of love :)

    for a while I honestly didn't believe in love (my parents, sister, and a whole bunch of other people around me cheated on their SOs or just fell out of love in general) but all that changed when I met the person who made me see things differently :)

    I'm sure you'll find her! Don't give up :) and don't blame yourself for not finding the right person yet :)

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    • Your words really helped me. Thank you for your encouragement and empathy.

    • Yay I'm glad :) good luck to you, I hope you find your 'one' soon :)

  • I think you're are not afraid you will is out because you didn't date a lot of people and experience more which could make you resent her... But you also shouldn't let the fear of not being other people let someone you care about slip away...

    Maybe what you need to do is let her go and see how you feel like try to date other people... Be honest with her about it all. And if you are meant to be you will be. If you realize you made a mistake and she is gone then it wasn't meant to be. But don't expect her to wait and not to be hurt. You need to weight your decision and ask yourself do where do you see yourself in 10 Years from now like is she right beside you? If you broke up and you heard she was with someone else would you be destroyed? Could you live without her?

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    • Even if she does find someone, if love is real then it is ment to be. Otherwise, do your best to heal your self and move on.

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    • You will know when you love someone. There isn't a set time on it. I have been move more then once and I can honestly say both were different loves. You have you're first love. School love. But to me this was head over heels true love. From the moment I laid eyes on him my heart felt something. I didn't know what. At first I found him to be annoying. I will call my mom and best friend and tell them how much this guy got under my skin and for no reason. I just couldn't stand him and we say little things me which would annoy me. After other people talked to me and told me he was nice and to give him a shot and that he liked me I let myself be open to it and we spoke to him a little in person and then added Him on fb and we spoke that day till 3am and as soon as he got up that morning we kept talking we talked more and more and exchanged numbers finally. Then it went from that to ft every night just talking for hours about nothing really. Then issues happened with exes and him not being

    • Fully ready for a relationship. It took close to hear for us to get together and make it official. We hung out all the time before then we wanted to be near each other. Before we dated I knew I loved him. I fell hard and instantly with him and he knew 3 months after talking to me he had fallen for me but didn't tell me. We didn't tell each other probably till 2-3 months later before dating. And I just knew I wanted to spend my life with this person how happy being near them made me... And yiu can be head over heel wanting to spend your life with someone and they feel that way to only later to realize they don't anymore it can happen... But only cause that person stop wanting to work at things. You will know and they will know. You both will feel the same. Don't beat yourself up forever. It's good that you don't want to just be a jerk and hurt her. You want to do it easily and you feel bad that you may have led her on. You care. She is someone you care about as a person.

  • Don't take offense to this, but I'm going to be blunt with you. If you feel this way now about the woman you are with, not being attracted to her and second guessing being with her, that won't change. You said that she's wonderful in every possible way, but that still isn't 'enough'. That's okay.
    It's not okay, however; to keep her hanging on. To be honest, I'd break it off because in the long run you will only be hurting the both of you by keeping it going.
    It's okay to not be attracted to someone, it's also okay to want to be attracted to the person you're with. I don't think it's the way you were raised unless you have one specific type because of it.

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    • No offence taken. There are others who really insulted me here. I am just torn and i don't want to hurt anybody. I am really not a bad man and i care for her... this is why i am here asking for advice.

      I will not keep her stranded. She deserves love and happiness.

  • You haven't met the right person. You're capable of both I'm sure :)

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  • Here is another man who wasting a perfect girl. If you think she is everything that all man want you should be so lucky that she choose you and loves you.
    Be grateful of what you have now, while so many men looking for that type of girl you already have her. How amazing is that? If you think that you can't be faithful to have a monogamy relationship with her than let her go. Tell her the truth and she deserves better. If she is willing to have an open relationship then you're damn lucky.
    Don't waste both of your time, you and her need to figure out about what you both want in the relationship. Good luck! cheers

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  • You found love... why should your past be in the way of what's happening now?

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    • If i found love.. why am i hesitant? just me wondering...

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    • That is a myth, uro. Losers in jail also get hot girls.

    • That's such a fat lie! Men do all the hard work? No, women bear all the weight of kids, working, our monthly, birth control, and taking care of the house! I know because I do it! Stop lying.

  • You haven't meet the right girl yet. A relationship is when you don't think about looks or anything else but just embrace the fact that you are in love with the other person.

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  • Love is something you know when it hits you shouldn't have to question it. Maybe if you don't feel it she isn't the one. You're not necessarily incapable of it just haven't met the right person.

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    • Maybe the questioning of love is the reason why relationships fall apart. I agree that you'll know when love hits you.

    • You are probably true. I think it was a fault to get attached to someone i was not sure of 100% about

  • sir, you're already 38 years old, for me it's big enough to settle down and live happily with someone who will love you. and sir, how much time more do you want to experiment and find another attractive woman? you're not in your 20s, and your main problem is, you always want something more, you're greedy.

    Be thankful, I think you've found the love of your life, be grateful. Love is not all about look, you're sucks at flirting, so I wonder what you you expecting to find attractive woman if you're not confident and insecure with yourself too. don't blame your culture, it's you the problem. you never want enough. maybe just take a moment to pause, breath in and start to think whatever you have now in life, and be thankful. If you love this girl, it's your catch. If not, just leave her, she deserve better than someone who still greedy to find "the better one". Sorry, I just giving you the non-sugarcoated truth.

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  • Wow, I'm going through the same situation right now. I'm the girl in the relationship. I have been with my fiancé for 13 years and he told me the other week that he wants to be with other girls who are more attractive than me. We have one 6 yr old boy and one girl on the way. He has broken my heart. Were going to counciling to see where to go next. For me I want to continue our relationship as I don't understand how someone can overlook so many things to make his dick happy, he's very shy as well, free up in SA, strict parents and I was his first when he was 22. He said he was lonely, desperate, curious, and so on. I say love her for her or move on. If my guy can't get over his image of wanting to be seen with someone "hot" then he's going to get the boot. I don't want to be with someone who isn't confident in our relationship.

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  • Sadly, you haven't met the right person yet. She hasn't either. Keep, looking and break it to her easy.

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    • Thanks for your advice and fir not being harsh.

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    • I told him the truth and said nothing he could do would make me stay. I told him I had my personal issues and he needed to find a different mate.

    • Did you go on to find love later on? How did he take it? Was it tough for you? Sorry if i bombard you with questions. I really appreciate your opinion

  • I think you should give her more time... I was in the same ordeal, in love with an older man in his thirties that was long distance from me. I wish he had stayed, but he didn't... it sounds like she is really in love with you. It is normal for men to ogle at attractive women on the streets too, but multiple partners will not bring love.

    Looks fade, but real love doesn't..

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  • Wake up, you can't date women who look like Meghan Fox. Don't let your stupid shallowness cloud your better judgement. You should be grateful you found someone worthwhile.

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  • Are you like that in other aspects of your life as well? Always wanting more than you have?

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    • I am ambitious, but not out of the normal i guess. I am not really a bad person. Or at least i try not to be. I actually write this question because care about her happiness as well as mine.

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    • First i would like to thank you. You are not judging actually.. the problem is that i love this girl fully with my brain and with half my heart. I didn't get a spark when we first met... but i grew to admire her. The issue is... i can't say the words '' I love you '' I can't feel them. I am torn.. my brain tells me she is a wonderful amazing girl... but i something inside me doesn't feel she is the one that will make me forget about all other girls. I am not a bad person.. i swear... i am just.. confused :( and never felt this ''love'' feeling.

    • Love is caring deeply and unconditionally for another person, like you 'd care for your parents. It's also feeling lust and desire. It's the fact that if you were able to choose between her and a supermodel, you 'd choose her once again. A teacher in our univercity was talking about relationships. He said he 'd choose his wife over any model, and if he could get married again, he 'd choose her once more. He saild he's content and happy with her, he doesn't want anyone better.

      There are people who are afraid to say 'I love you'. It's called 'fear of commitment'. They are afraid of having a serious relationship or getting married in general. Other people with low confidence are afraid to say it because they feel that by saying it they get more vulnerable, and the other person might hurt them.

      I can't tell you if you love her or not. You should find out yourself. Ask yourself.

  • Right person will come at right moment for you. Its okay. I feel the same thing

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  • She is definetly the one. And don't be so picky! You are really old not to move married. Don't expect to be marrying a supermodel. I wish you both the best.

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  • Why would you leave her just because you don't like her appearance? At the end of the day you have a lovely young woman. Why does her appearance matter?

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  • Sucks to be you.
    Leave her and start fucking around, if that's what you really want.

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    • Yeah dude just do that, you dont really love her and thats really obvious then just leave her dont do that to her lmao

      Go sleep around and drink with more women, approach other women and try to have consent sex with the ones you're attracted to, maybe someday you'll find someone youd get involved with or not l, who cares, marriage is worthless and whether you're dying alone or with company, internally you will forever be lonely and thats just human nature, good luck

  • Nas once said
    “I’ll be the first man to admit. That a fat ass caught my attention, but never made me faithful. A pretty face got me to commit, but never change me. It was that funny girl with that beautiful personality, million dollar smile and a heart of gold that left me in tears begging for a second chance. I never viewed women the same after her. She left my heart convinced that love is more about chemistry than biology.”
    ‪#‎ItRunsDeeper‬

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    • That chemistry/biology thing makes no sense.

    • That is why it is so hard

    • I believe it could be because there are some ugly ass guys with really pretty chicks in love with them. Personality, attraction, and chemistry combined make for a perfect mate in my opinion.

  • Good looks will fade eventually if you are looking for a life partner.

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  • "I didn't live a normal youth due to my culture and family. Didn't sleep around or hookup. So in the area of relationships i am probably much behind my age."

    First off, do you think people from your home country are miserable for waiting until marriage (that may or may not have been arranged by a matchmaker) to have sex and are all cheating on their wives now and this is what you're trying to avoid?

    If not, I'm wondering if you're trying a little too hard to assimilate to the new culture and society that you think you must have had a wild sex life and tasted the rainbow first before you can settle down.

    I don't think there is one right person that can stop your desire for promiscuity. You are the person who has to make that decision from within. If you cannot, at least, not right now, you should not string anyone along.

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  • No you're not

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  • I would stop focusing on her looks. You like everything about this girl and know she is marrying type, yet she isn't attractive? Last time I checked, love is blind. Therefore, looks become nothing. Clearly you're not into this girl as much as you think because if you were, her looks would mean nothing to you. Leave this poor girl so she can find someone who appreciates her before you completely destroy her!

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  • The desire to have sex with attractive people doesn't go away. Especially for men, but honestly, in most women too, after the newness wears off. For most people, monogamy is a choice, not a brain setting. What makes the choice worth it is closeness, integrity, connection, loyalty, etc.

    You don't really go into if you actually enjoy each other's company, with is vital to figure out. Do you trust her, feel safe with her, laugh with her? Etc.

    If you have those bonds along with sexual excitement, thats a solid base to build love. But love rarely takes away sexual interest in other people, it just builds something that isn't worth throwing away for the sake of that interest.

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  • While I do think that it's important to feel attracted to your partner... let's face it, do you REALLY have many other options than her? Do you REALLY have the time to have random hookups with women you find attractive physically? Why is it so important to you to "experience different women?" What will you gain from it, other than MAYBE, if you're lucky, a couple of notches in the bedpost? A lot of women your age, and even 10 years younger, are looking to settle down. They want marriage, serious relationships. Very few only want to hook up, since they feel like it would be a waste of their time.

    What's disturbing is that you would so easily let go of someone who actually loves you, and for what? Sex with random women? That's pathetic. I get that you can't force yourself to be attracted to her. But you should really reconsider, think about what you're about to throw away. And just for sex. A lot of people would kill to have someone like her for a partner. I feel like this is the sort of thing you'll regret in 5-10 years or so. And honestly, as harsh as this might sound, you don't exactly sound like a guy with a lot of options, or a guy with a lot of game. I doubt you'll be able to hook up with too many women, especially considering that you had your first (unhappy) relationship at 28. And to our knowledge, this is the only girl so far who has actually showed this amount of interest in you.

    Take a look at what you have now, and think about what you're throwing it away for. Honestly, if it's that easy for you to choose casual sex over a loving woman, then she deserves better than you.

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What Guys Said 16

  • My dear friend, lifelong relationships are not built on just a conglomeration of texts.

    You need to take some trust in this woman. You said you "spend months with each other". Sounds like you found a girl who really loves you! Yet you ask if you should leave this girl? FOR WHOM?

    Look, I am 62 years old! I have been married to my wife for close to 40 years. I love her and she loves me. We have been true to each other.
    Does that mean that lovely women simply 'disappear?' Of course not!
    There are beautiful, stunning, smart, fun loving women everywhere (thank God). Does that mean we jump on every woman we find attractive? I sure hope not.

    Be happy that you have found a girl you care for so much, and that the feeling is mutual. You may have insecurities from your childhood, but I think with this woman you've struck a pot of gold.

    Don't give up on a sure thing, you are better off than many of the people in the world looking for that significant other.

    Take care and don't lose this girl's affection for you. Be kind to ALL the women in your life, but especially to this girl. It is she who will stand with you through the rough patches in life. You need a good strong woman in your life. Good Luck with her. I wish you bothe well.

    😃

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  • Don't prejudge people by their looks. Too many inexperienced people make that mistake.
    Looks are the least important factor. Try to get to know people in real life situations, and don't judge them or try to decide if they are 'right' without FIRST knowing something more important about them.

    Stop analyzing people BEFORE you even know them! And you will find you'll be more comfortable around them.

    Good luck!! Nothing strange about your being this way, but you need to change your approach to people.

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  • perfect doesn;t exist in my opinion

    only "best choices"... anyway if u start thinkin "is she right>? is she perfect?" u'll go crazy bro... marry her if u think so... but wotever happens will happen :-)

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  • Who cares if she's ugly, you're almost 40. If you want to get married then marry her.

    The grass isn't greener on the other side, the grass is dead.

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    • Kid... where did you read the word ''Ugly'' ?

    • "I liked her , but i didn't feel this wow factor in terms of looks" -you

  • It's not your duty to make her happy. She can (and will) find someone else if not you.

    Your duty is to make you happy. You could keep looking, which is a gamble. Or you could accept that she is the best you can do.

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  • Louis CK: There are people out there who there's just nobody for them. People like to say things like: "There's someone for everyone".. NOPE. Not at all true, and stop saying it 'cause it's mean to people who never find anybody.

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  • Personally, I say you should try to be with her. She sounds like an amazing person, and if you thing that you can be the right guy for her and make her happy, you definitely should.
    And many studies have shown that the most stable marriages come from relationships where love grows over time instead of peaking early and dwindling as time goes on. If you think you can make it work, go for it - odds are you guys will be happy.

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  • Everyone is capable of love my friend, even Hitler loved, I think it just takes the right women, but in the end you have to listen deeply to your heart, to your gut instinct is this girl right for you, only you can ultimately decide whether or not she is someone you can spend the rest of your life with.

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    • Naw, Hitler fucked. Maybe. Not sure how he got so impressed with 6 ft+ blonde men as the ideal when he was like 5-8.

    • @zagor I was referring to his mother he loved her quite deeply to the point that the doctor that tried endlessly to save her, never he even left her room, was the only Jew spared during the entire holocaust Hitler even gave him a mansion.

      Also it wasn't blonde men that interested him but the Aryan race.

    • But his ideal was tall blonde men. Which didn't match Hitler, Himmler or Goebbels, but that was the ideal on all the posters. The negative posters showing Jews actually looked a lot more like them, ironically.

  • Maybe NOT monogamy will be easier.. No big deal once you accept what you cannot change and realize that just because you can't seem to stay monogamous... You're not broken, not malfunctioning and you're "ok", overall. So, work with what you got..
    Don't even try monogamy for a bit.
    But do get out there..

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  • So it sounds like the only problem bothering you is looks right? Well, it depends how far below your standard she is. Just remember one thing though, you'll much rather have a plain girl you really loves you, appreciates your attention than a pretty girl who you don't feel good enough for, isn't appreciative of you, has other guys chasing her all the time etc. Unless you are a major catch, trust me its not worth it. Always go with a girl who chooses you.

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  • If you are not 100% invested in this relationship, it is best to stop wasting your time and hers and move on.

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  • Love isn't anything special bro. Just stay single and masturbate to porn. Have fun doing what makes you happy.

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  • Welcome to the lonely hearts club Iam 57 can't even get a date, don't give up! :-)

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  • You will love Brazil. Here you will find some answers. I'm sure

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  • i think u should just give up

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  • Wow, really, seriously, very first girlfriend at age 28?

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    • man... in my home country you should be a virgin until you marry... its a total different ball game...

    • So the answer is yes, to my question?

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