Need your perspective on my ex?

Me&my ex were together for over a year. The RS was awesome, we barely argued, had the same music taste, good connections with families and friends, had the same sense of humour etc. I'd say everything 1 could ask for. He even planned kids with me in the future-saying he wanted to stay with me because he couldn't imagine his life with anyone else. We were each other's 1st love, which was cute back there but now I see it's probably the main problem. The thing is after that year together he started to act distant, barely texted me and had a weak need to see me. It hurted so after some time I asked what was happening. He answered that he didn't know what he wanted&he didn't know if he still loved me etc. I was hurt as hell. We broke up.. I found a rebound RS but it didn't last. When he found out I was with that other guy, my ex unfriend me on FB and was total mad- He had a rebound too but it didn't last either. After 3 month of NC he texted me ( I was still with the other guy and he just started dating that girl), saying he wanted to stay friends and talk again. I agreed&we multiple times texted. We even saw each other on a ball and talked -it was really nice, we had fun, told each other news that'd happened, had a great time like we used to. Then on Easter he visited us with his friends. When his friends wanted to go he said he didn't want to yet so he stayed. For 7 hours! And as u can say we didn't act like friends.. It was like if we'd never been apart. However, since that day he started to act distant again and the last contact was 3 weeks ago. He has now lot of problems- family issues, school and money problems. And even tho he acts like a taugh guy, he's always been really sensitive and good-hearted, just a bit immature. Since I was his 1sr girl, he clearly started to feel like he was missing out on life and wanted to experience more. A big part were his stupid friends too, saying him to have more fun wit others. He is 18 now, met me at 16. Do u think when he grows up he'll realize what he lost?


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  • Sounds like he is going through a lot, and sometimes when a person has stressful things they are going through, they kind of retreat to deal with them, especially guys. All you can do is be a friend to him if he does reach out.

    In my opinion, I believe you have secured a place in his heart that will last forever. He will most likely always look back fondly on your time together, first loves tend to have that special place. However, as he grows up and gains more experience in his life, I wouldn't say he will look back and "regret" or "realize what he lost". People seldom stay with their first love forever. And honestly, if he harbors that kind of thought about you, he would probably do something about it. You never know, maybe in few years when you've both had time to get through school and all, you might be together again, depending on the changes you go through personally. My advice - be young and have fun. It doesn't last long, there's plenty of time to think about settling down, kids, etc. Good luck to you!

    • Yeah couldn't agree more with that special place... He's got one in mine heart as well, pretty much saved for the rest of my life even after so much pain he put me through.. But I hope when he sorts out those issues and gets to meet other girls he might realize that I only wanted the best for him, for us.. I tried to save the RS but anytime it looked like it's going the right way, he pushed me away again, saying he didn't know what he wanted. That's what happens right? You know what u had when it's gone.. I want the best for him but also want him to realize that we were worth the fight.. I believe everything happens for a reason, I wil hopefully either find someone who appreciates me or he will grow up and come to his mind and we might get a second chance:)

    • You wrote: "I believe everything happens for a reason, I wil hopefully either find someone who appreciates me or he will grow up and come to his mind and we might get a second chance..

      Exactly!! That is just how life works, and whatever you do, don't stop living hoping he will come around. And maybe you will find someone, maybe you won't. You're young, so my advice would be to concentrate less on trying to get into a "relationship" and just concentrate on figuring the things out that define you as an individual. Sometimes relationships tend to become our main identifier, and at this age, you should be figuring that out outside of a relationship, so that when you're fully "developed" so to speak, you will find the right guy and it will last because you know exactly who you are/what your identity is :) Take care!

  • doesn't sound like he will.

    • Thanks for opinion, just tell me the reason you think so otherwise it's not really usefull

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