Me and my Ex have been on and off for three years and she broke up with me recently and I simply want to understand where I went wrong?

Me and my ex have been on and off for like three years we were friends for like two and really invested in each other she was madly in love with me and eventually I too fell in love, we seriously dated for about 5 months and eventually she cheated on me and I forgave her and took her back after she came crawling and crying back to me, then we got back together for awhile again and she broke up with me once again and left me for the guy she first cheated on me with... two-3months past by and she came
crawling back once more and it took everything for me to forgive her and take her back we were friends for awhile and then decided to become a thing again.. well now she's broken up with me again and at first told me it was a break and I needed the summer to get my act right but something was up and come to find out a week later she's dating the same guy again... she said she's a carefree person and wants to be with another carefree person and that in the future maybe she'll want something different and if we both want it we can try again but for now she's doing what makes her happy and is sorry that it doesn't include me at the moment... we've decided to stay friends in all of this but I don't understand what do I lack that he has? Is she rebounding again to what's comfortable for her? She's not even coping with this she's not really trying to find herself but instead just sleeping with someone again so fast.

Updates:
I just don't understand, I asked her why she went back and she says she missed him so I don't get why she doesn't tell me she's just happier with this guy and loves him more than me, I've never cheated on her lied to her or crossed her in anyway I've had my faults in the relationship such as my anger issues and my lack of understanding but that's not a reason to just jump ship people can change
We just hung out and had a regular conversation and she expressed herself as if nothing ever happened and she told me she enjoys seeing me and talking to me and the fact that I still care and reach out to her like I do and still get along with her even through all this... I don't know if her boyfriend knows that we are still friends or even had this convo or that we even saw each other but i would never try and fuck them over, I know my role even if given the chance I wouldn't disrespect him

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Most Helpful Guy

  • You sound too nice... that is why this keeps happening. I don't quite understand how you lack so much self respect that you still want this woman, who has cheated on you multiple times, and why you were so weak to her tears.

    She is obviously a thrill and adrenaline junky, a drama lover and someone that you couldn't satisfy in these regards.

    I am not trying to make you feel worse but I am trying to make you understand you would be better off with someone else that is trustworthy and not stringing you along until a bad boy comes to hump and dump her before she returns to you, the ever waiting good boy.

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    • Will she ever learn though? This guy is madly in love with her so I know their relationship will work out that's why I let it go so easily this time and refrained from begging for her back but I still want to know reasons as to why she's doing this instead of staying single and handling her problems like a real woman

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    • Yeah she's never reall fully struggled she's always had help or been helped and I've done a lot of helping and paying and aiding... so sometimes she simply seems to take things for granted... I don't know man I've been activating no contact I just have so much faith in this girl I truly don't know if this is a mere phase will she ever realize

    • And she told me to stop comparing myself to this guy and that the only competition that exist is in my head but it's hard not to compare myself when she is basically telling me that this guy is basically her soulmate how does she not see how traumatizing this is for me? She expresses how happy he makes her yet I'm here trying to do the same thing it sucks knowing I'll never be that guy and make her as happy as he does

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What Girls Said 1

  • just cut her off.

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    • Why you say that? And I mean I have in a way, even though we're still friends I don't ask for her back or even text her consistently we barely talk

What Guys Said 1

  • whoa dude... don't be jealous... anyway, one day she might come back 2 u... since u are still friends :)

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    • I am jealous and she probably knows that, but I can't help it like I'm such a great guy and did so much for her I simply want to know wtf I'm worth to her and why this guy who's not even half the man that I am or did half of what I did for her what do I lack?

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    • I do realize that but why Toss me like that? Why tell me all these crazy things why lie about her love for me

    • Why am I dying while she's happy as fuck when that's all I tried to do for her

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