Due to the past, I told her to do not drink anymore or I would break up with her. But she thinks that I prison her, I live in the past, I dont trust her. And being drunk is nothing serious. So I would like you give her some suggestions to make her realize my fear and my love. We are at the stage of enganement, and I came out to my mom ( my country is very conserative ) , and I met her family and they all know that we are getting married soon. I am 31, she is 27, we are both girlish girl, Dating for 2 years. Living together for 1 year.
Word From her.
"The fact is you forbid me to be social, if I can not go to bar with my friends then I can not do anything, I do not mind to not drink and you know that, the point is I refuse all the party things because of you, and if I do so you will get jealous or ask to come with you.
Of course is not normal from you to go to bar when you ask me to even do not drink one glass.
I do not want get drunk or go to club. I want have a normal social life: Drink a glass of wine, even at home, or during a diner. Be able to have an afterwork beer with my coworker."
< I haven't go to bar for a year for us, but she did sometimes. And I seldom drink for her as well to show her that a normal life can be happy with alcohol. And I planed to go to a dine maybe a bar called " bar A sth", which is chosen by my friend, at 6:30 with a friend she knows and free to join>
It's due to the past and will effect the future. So why I forbidden her even for one glass now.
Long story. Be patient.
- Break up with herVote A
- Give her last chance but be sure to break up if she drinks againVote B
- Stay with her now. The past is past, drinking is under her controlVote C
- She should see a Dr both for her psychical and physical conditionVote D
- Ask her to show you some real action and decide to be with her or notVote E
The deepest fear and hurt still inside of me is her betrayal. She kissed 2 girls in front of my friends and me in the party. She had one night stand with a stranger for once when she is drunk. She cheated on me for like a week and told me she is too drunk and the girl keep flirting her. I broke up and came back to her several times later coz she promised that she is too drunk and being stupid but it will never happen again. It never happens again for more than one year
When she is drunk, she can’t remember anything the second day. Her last time admitted blackout is two month before and lost her phone and bag when I was in another city for the first night. But she told me nothing happened when she came back in the morning. The only thing I can do it to trust her story. But she doesn’t think it’s a problem even for losing memory.
Most Helpful Girl
It sounds like she blames alcohal for her infidelities. I am engaged, and I have been to a couple of parties where my significant other could not make it. Yes, there we're attractive people there.. Yes, I was pretty damn drunk. A cute guy grabbed me and kissed me and I pushed away and said I have a boyfriend. Even in my drunken state, I still stayed faithfull. Being drunk is NOT an excuse. If it is to the point where people are telling you "there is a problem" then there is a problem. You do realize that yes, break ups hurt soooo much, BUT say if you find someone who is better, whom you are so happy that you ended your last relationship, it is going to be worth the grievance of a breakup.0