So my boyfriend (now ex) and I were dating for 4 months, and in the first two months everything was great. I let him move in (big mistake) and things started going south really bad very fast. In the beginning he warned me that he had "a bit of a temper", but assured me that he was just loud when he argued. Which was fine, because I always walk away when arguments get bad until things simmer down. Well, this was hard with him; he started out just shouting, then throwing things, then hitting walls. I kicked him out after he backed me into a corner and was screaming overtop of me because it scared me, I'm only 5'0" and he's 6'4". I let him move back in when he promised to see a therapist. Once he moved back in, he never went to therapy.
It all fell apart, we had a big blow up when I discovered he was talking to his ex via text (he left his phone open) and I was super upset. He got mad at me because he claimed I was a hypocrite for having a platonic male friend, which somehow made him talking to his ex saying how much he missed her was okay. We got into a match of yelling and I tried to walk away, and he grabbed me. I told him to let me go and I admittedly cursed at him, and then he slapped me. It was hard enough that my back hit the counter and it left a bruise. I was quiet and then I told him to leave immediately. He tried to apologize and I kept telling him to leave. He then got verbally abusive and then I called the cops and had him removed. I refused to talk to him again or see him again after that. He and a few of my friends say I am overreacting and that I need to learn to forgive, since he never hit me before that night and in a way I "instigated him." I was raised to never allow anybody to put their hands on me and he broke his promise to get help. I don't want to have to be afraid, but people are making me second guess myself.
Did I overreact? Should I consider talking to him again or move on?
Most Helpful Girl
Oh my god, no! You are defiantly not over reacting. He yelled and screamed at you first which can easily progress into something worse. Which obviously it did. He will do it again if he gets angry enough. Move on from him, you deserve so much better. I am so glad you had the chance to kick him out. You are strong! Most women in an abusive relationship can't do that. My ex text multiple girls and hitting on them. He screamed at me for looking at his phone when I witnessed him texting someone. He almost push me down the stairs. Thank god you got out safety. Don't listen to your friends, do what you think it right.2